Smudging Ink
by Kaliotrimma
Summary: A Mangaka trying to make his way in the world, Naruto bumps into an old college friend who turns out to be none other than Uchiha Sasuke. With Sasuke's help can Naruto make it to the top and what is this new feeling Naruto has for him? Yaoi NaruSasu
1. In which there is a meeting

Hey al! To everyone who reads my fics, big thank you! This is a collab I've been concocting with Akiru Chan, who is just the coolest ever. In this AU, Naruto and Sasuke have already struggled through college and parted ways, so if something seems OOC, it's because... they aren't ninjas. Probably.

* * *

Naruto sighed, mussing up his hair in confusion. Tech didn't like him, and he didn't like tech. What was the difference between the ink cartridge with the little '7' on it and the one with the little '19' on it? Shrugging, he decided to screw the whole thing and try again later, when his head wasn't throbbing quite so badly. The blonde made a break for the isle he _knew_ had calligraphy ink, which was something he needed. He quickly scanned the shelves, finding nothing. Naruto looked again, slowly.

"Why, God? What have I done to you? I know this is where the calligraphy shit is. It was there three days ago, and it was there four months ago. Why is it gone now?" The blonde muttered, slumping. Brisk footsteps sounded behind him, and someone passed the isle Naruto was in. He heard the squeak of rubber as the unknown person skidded to a halt.

"..." There was an intake of breath that seemed ungodly familiar to him, so Naruto turned.

"Holy-" He began, eyes widening. There was a thump as the brunette before him dropped a package of printer paper. "Sasuke!?"

"Dobe." Said Uchiha responded, failing to suppress a grin. "Hello."

"_Whoa_. This is _so_ weird. I haven't seen you since graduation, when you stabbed me in the leg with a pencil. Hey, those bloodstains never fully came out." Naruto chuckled slightly. "Not that it matters. Man, it's been, what, a year and a half?"

"Give or take. Sasuke looked him over carefully, "You look stupider than you did in college."

"And you're even more of a bastard. Some things just never change I guess." Naruto taunted, feeling a playfulness that always seemed to bubble up when around the Uchiha. It was a feeling he had long forgotten, yet missed terribly.

"Hn." Was Sasuke's only reply; he was never big on words.

"So... What brings you here? Last time I heard you had high tailed it to New York to begin your plan to dominate the world."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow, not wanting to answer right away. It had been forever since he had seen his old friend... were they even friends? Rivals would be a more appropriate word. And because of that he wanted this to last for as long as he could draw it out.

He walked past the blond and plucked a package of clear page protectors off the shelf. Once they were safely in his hands, he opened his mouth to speak.

"Well technically I am not dominating the world, just the publishing industry. As for me being here, it's none of your concern." he said with the trademark Uchiha smirk in place.

_Publishing industry-_ "Uh. So... um. How's life?" Naruto stammered uncertainly, blinking. _Publishing industry. D'oh fuck._

"Fine, I guess. It's not like I'm running the University Mafia anymore."

"That was the most ridiculous club ever." Naruto threw his arms in the air. "Really weird."

Sasuke smirked. "Only because we wouldn't let you in."

Naruto grumbled. "Hmmph. Stupid bastard."

"Meh."

The silence was immediately shortened as an obnoxious, loud song filled the air. Naruto scrambled for his phone, stopping the song in its tracks. Sasuke was doing well at keeping a straight face, seeing as the ringtone had been 'The Bad Touch'.

Naruto's cheeks heated as he answered the phone. "Yeah, Sakura-chan?" A pause as she berated him. "Uhm. Well, the shelves are stupid. Yeah."

Oh, Sakura, his editor and one true abuser. So beautiful, so friggin' mean.

Sasuke stiffened. "I'll just go now..."

"No! Uh, not you Sakura-chan. You'll never guess who I ran into..." Naruto took Sasuke's arm in an iron grip.

Sasuke made a desperate cut-throat gesture. Naruto grinned, and held the phone away from his ear to inform Sasuke, "Don't worry, she's over you. Remember Lee? Bushy eyebrows, creepy bowl-cut? They hit it off."

There was a flurry yells from his phone as Sakura loudly informed him that he needed to get back to work instead of hanging around an almost-deserted Office Max.

"Sakura-chan! Ngh, listen to me! _I_," He began dramatically," Have just run into Uchiha Sasuke in this almost-deserted Office Max."

"I don't care if you ran into the friggin' Presid- Wait, who?" Came Sakura's tinny voice from the cell.

"Sasuke. Y'know, black hair, total jerk..." Naruto rolled his eyes at Sasuke, who sighed dramatically.

"I heard you! Well. Uh... tell him 'Hi' for me. It's getting kind of late, Naruto."

"So?"

"So um.. oh, just be careful."

Sasuke was poking Naruto's hand, attempting to pry his fingers open.

"Bye, Sakura-chan. Sasuke's having a conniption fit." He closed his phone with a snap. "What's up with you?"

"Itachi's expecting me back. I'll get hell if I'm home late again." Sasuke grumbled.  
Naruto blinked. _Itachi? Who was... sounded familiar. Sasuke didn't have a girlfriend, did he?_ Naruto's heart sank slightly.

"Uh-huh. And Itachi is...?"

"About to call me. I just know it." On cue, a techno version of Beethoven's Fifth filled the isle.

"Lemme go so I can answer this." Sasuke jerked his phone out. "Mushi mushi, aniki."

_Whoo-hoo! Brother, not girlfriend!_

Sasuke frowned as he heard his brother on the other line.

"Yes, I am coming now... No, I was... What?" Sasuke made a discusted face.

"Hell NO, you pervert... I was getting page protectors... I would have been home sooner but I ran into an old college friend." He momentarily glared at Naruto; this was clearly all the blondes fault.

"Ok... whatever... bye." With a flick of his wrist, Sasuke closed his phone and placed in back within his black dockers.

Naruto watched in amusement, obviously Sasuke and his brother didn't get along to well.

Turing back to the blond, Sasuke ran slender fingers through his raven locks. "Well I'd better get going. I have wasted enough time here already."

Naruto nodded in understand, as he watched the Uchiha walk away, yet something inside of him told him not to let him leave again. He had let the raven haired man walk out of his life once and Naruto was unsure if he could stand to let that happen again.

Without even realizing it, Naruto walked forward and grasped the cuff of Sasuke's sleeve.

"What."

"I... uhm... er... You called me your friiiiend," Naruto covered, turning discreetly red.

"Hn. It'd take too long to fully explain our relationship." Sasuke said coolly, snatching another pack of page protectors from the rack. "I'm just about done here."

"Oh... Uh... it was nice seeing you again, I guess. I know you're tight on time, so... Oh, _there's_ my calligraphy ink." Naruto bent at the waist to pluck the ink from the bottom shelf, "Heh. I though you were being flighty, m'dear," he said to the bottle, hearing Sasuke's derisive snort behind him.

"Oh, shit." Sasuke swore, "They're outta page dividers."

"Dun dun DUUUUUUN!" Naruto mocked, imitating Sasuke's 'I am pissed' face. "Da horra!"

"Stop that, it's moronic." Sasuke whacked him with the page protectors. Naruto dropped to the ground in theatrical shock and horror.

"Look!" He cried, holding up his hand, "You paper-cut me!"

"These are plastic!" Sasuke waved the package. Naruto grinned.

"You _plastic-cut_ me!"

"I'm leaving." Sasuke turned away. Naruto grabbed him by the pants, managing to pull himself up, slip his number into Sasuke's pocket, and not yank Sasuke's dockers down at the same time.

"Stop doing that! You never asked me what I've been up to!"

Sasuke groaned. "Fine. What are you up to, oh brainless one?"

"You don't have to sound so enthusiastic, Sasuke. But, IF you must know, I am now... well, doodling for a living."

Sasuke scoffed. "You total moron. You're living off of sketches?"

"Sorta, but it's more complicated then that. I create manga!" Naruto beamed with pride.

"You mean those childish comic books, about magic, and girls with too short of skirts and too big of boobs, and crap like that?"

Naruto pouted as his shoulders fell, taking on a depressed shape. "You make it sound like it's a bad thing."

"Well dobe, you should have gone into real literature. Be a novelist not some mangaka. Besides you can express so much more feeling and emotions through words rather than doodles of characters with bug eyes." Sasuke had never been a fan of cartoons no matter what form they came with. When his parents were still alive they used to look down on the shows and books calling them trash and rubbish.

Even as a child, Sasuke would stick his nose up at them. He was an Uchiha and above such meaningless things.

"That's not true. Manga are so much more than silly little cartoons. You would not believe the sort of emotions you can portray through the art and characters. I usually write romance and angst... with a little humour." He said with a smile. "Maybe you should give one of them a read sometime. You just might be surprised, teme."

"I highly doubt that." The smirk was back in place as he looked down at the smiling blonde. Naruto was still short but not by much. Sasuke only stood a hair taller.

"Whatever you say. Well whether you like them or not, I am still going to become famous off of them."

Sasuke raised a slender eyebrow, "Uhuh... I will believe it when I see it."

"Oh Sasuke-" Naruto clenched his chest, "Your doubt wounds me."

"Neh." Sasuke shrugged. "Uh...you have ink on you."

"Fuck!" Naruto yelled, perhaps a little loudly, "One of the stupid bottles must've been open! I should sue."

"For what?" Sasuke cocked his hip, stacking his purchases neatly in his arms.

"Uh... What can you sue for?"

Sasuke shrugged. "Reckless endangerment, fraud... Lots of things. But I don't think,'Your stupid product leaked on my ass' is good enough."

"It's on my ass too?" Naruto manuevered around to look. "Why where you looking there..."

There was an awkward silence.

Beethoven's Fifth rang out again.

"Dammit. Aniki? Hai... No, I've got the stuff, I'm just lea- Kisama! Did you just _giggle?_ Aniki, is Kisame over there?!?" Sasuke paused to listen. "Are you... what are you doing? Are you _drunk!?!_ Aniki! I'm not going home to that. You're gonna have to wait for your goddamn office supplies. I'm not going home to something that creepy. Put Kisame on." Another pause. "So... you got Itachi drunk so you could... paint his nails. I'm guessing there's some inside joke here. I'm not even going to ask. Look, I don't want to be around him while he's drunk- Stop doing whatever you're doing to him, I can here him laughing and it's _weird._.."

Naruto made a 'Yap-yap-yap' gesture with his hands, groaning when he smudged the ink over more of his hand.

Sasuke made a face. "No. Yeah... no. I'll just... get a hotel room or something. I can't deal with him when he's like that, I just can't. You remember what happened last time. No. Yeah. Okay." Sasuke's voice took on a whiny tone, as the phone was clearly handed back to his brother. "Aniki. Don't. I don't want to! You can't make me, I'm not a minor. _Itachi_. Gaaah. I'm hanging up on you. If you call back, I'll ignore it. I'll stay out all night with some random person- I'll find a freaking hooker- if you don't stop being so creepy. I'll come back with an STD. I'm not gay. Stop saying I'm gay. I will not- GOOD FREAKING BYE." Sasuke snapped his phone shut.

Naruto rolled his eyes. _Jeez, talk about trying to sober up your brother..._

Sasuke groaned. "Dammit. He's not- Please say you weren't listening to that."

Naruto shrugged. "Sounds like your gay bro's smashed with his boyfriend and they're doing something nasty."

Sasuke smacked himself in the head with a pack of printer paper. "Goddammit. Maybe Sai'll take me in for the night... wait, he'll probably mess with me in my sleep. Uncle Obito... damn, he's got company tonight. I'm not going to a stupid hotel, weirdoes hang out there."

"Whatever happened to shacking up with a hooker?" Naruto taunted, moving his hips suggestively. Sasuke glared at him, turning pink.

"That was a desperate attempt to get back at him for being drunk. It's not actually going to happen."

"Dude, if you're out of a place to stay, you could always... you know... My door is always open. If you want. I have a spare futon. It'd be no biggie."

Sasuke blinked. "I... you don't have any pets, do you?"

"Nope. Okay, except Piru, my goldfish that I won at a county fair almost eight years ago. Have you noticed that those goldfish either die within a week or hang around for freaking ever just getting old?"

Sasuke smiled a little at that. "I know some people who're just like that."

"Oh, do tell."

* * *

Well, here we go, the first chapter of the love-drama that will be known as Smudging Ink until we come up with something catchier.

Assuming we can come up with something else.

Remember, read and REVIEW! Reviews are my happy crack, they inspire me.


	2. In which drama reigns

Chapter two is alive! In which here is drama, and the plot begins to form. It really is going somewhere, I swear!

* * *

What seemed to be hours later the two men had exited the office store with their purchases in tow. Naruto with his ink and Sasuke with his page protectors, page dividers (They ended up finding some hidden under some florescent pink folders.), and what ever else his sadistic brother had asked for.

He looked down at his watch, seeing that he had wasted another hour or so of his life. It was all his maniac brother and this blond dobe's fault. Then again, he guessed that he should be a little thankful for Naruto's hospitality, yet something told him things were going to be quite interesting from now on. Sasuke wasn't so sure if he liked that idea or not.

"So where did you park?" Naruto broke the silence with his seemingly innocent question.

Sasuke pointed to a sleek black sports car. He was unsure of what model but he guessed it was an expensive foreign model.

"Shall I just follow you home?" The Uchiha asked, looking at Naruto who was currently inspecting the vehicle.

Naruto looked up with a sheepish grin plastered on his face. "Well you see... I sorta don't have a vehicle... I kinda usual take the bus."

Sasuke slapped a hand to his forehead.

"What would you have done if you'd missed that bus then?" He finally asked, trying not to bitch at the blonde for being so cheap.

"I would sleep in the park!" Naruto crowed triumphantly. "Man, this thing's pretty. Can I drive?"

"NO."

"C'mon... pleeeease? It'll be faster than me giving you directions."  
Naruto whined at the brunette, cute factor rising to a dangerously high level. "You know you waaant to..." He purred. Sasuke turned pink, slightly disturbed at the blonde's sudden change of tone.

"... fine. Just don't get us killed."

Naruto did not, indeed, get them killed. He did manage to nearly give Sasuke a heart attack by spinning the wheel, but odds were good that there'd be no lasting psychological damage.

Sasuke still hadn't gotten his heart rate back to normal by the time Naruto screeched to a tire-burning stop in front of his apartment complex.

"I..." Naruto began, as hey walked into the building, "Have the biggest apartment... EVER."

"Joy," Sasuke drawled. "How big would that be?"

"Big."

"Joy."

"Yes, big joy. Yay joy!" Naruto sniggered slightly. "Oi! Old man! What're you doing up so late, spying on your tenants?"

The 'old man' in question turned, no doubt about to give Naruto a piece of his mind, when Sasuke coughed. There was a pause.

"Ooh-hoo, guest tonight?" Jiraiya half-giggled, "I thought you weren't straight. Good to see I'm right."

"PERVERT! Oi, I could rat you out. No women would get apartments here. And Sasuke is not that kind of guest! Jeez, it's like a man can't take in his old college roomie for a night. It's not like I've ever had that kind of guest..."

"If you touch me in my sleep, I'll slice your fingers off." Sasuke clarified, making Jiraiya blanch.

"Creepy bugger, isn't he?"

"He's gonna kill you, old man."

"Nah. He reminds me of an old friend of mine."  
Naruto chuckled.

"He must be pretty old."

Sasuke was unsure how he should feel about the man's statement. Did he really want to remind this perv of someone he knew? Kami only knows the kinds of creeps that would befriend him.

"Who are you callin' old you twerp? He is my age for your information."

"Oh then I stand corrected, he must be really, _really_ old then." Naruto squeaked as Jiraiya tried to grab the blonde in a headlock. Luckily, he was fast and easily avoided it, heading up the stairs, calling after Sasuke.

"Come on teme... unless you wanna sleep with that old fart tonight."

"Naruto you get your ass back down here!" Jiraiya yelled as Sasuke took off after the blond. He didn't really want to spend more time with that man than he had too.

The young men walked side by side up the steps until they reached a door with silver plated numbers that read 3621.

"Where here." Naruto said as he placed his key in the lock and opened the oak door revealing a room masked in darkness.

Upon entering, the blond bumped around in the dark before a sound of triumph was heard and the room was soon filled with light.

To Sasuke's surprise, the dobe had not been lying. The apartment was actually quite large, albeit not as big as his own but still impressive.

"So this is where you call home?"

"Yup! You like?" Sasuke nodded his head as he looked around the neatly organized living room. The decor was modern but with traditional sense. The colors reminded him of the ocean, deep and pale blue's with an accent of sea green. Overall, it oddly fitted the hyperactive blond, even if the room screamed calm and the blond screamed energy.

"You look shocked." Naruto said flatly. "What, my place not good enough?"

"It's not that- Uh. Well..."

"Yeah yeah, you always have low expectations. I know. So isn't it wicked?"

Sasuke grimaced. "It has laundry." He edged around a shirt that was strewn half on a chair.

"Okay, okay, I never said I was neat." Naruto grumbled, looking around. "Old man better not cut my hot water tonight for the comments."

"He's done that before?" Sasuke asked, warily.

"Only when I smacked him but good." Naruto said firmly," And he totally deserved it."

"God, I feel dirty," Sasuke murmured, running his hand through his hair. "What I would give for a hot shower..."

"Okay, okay. Let's see... I am prepared to offer you hot water for..." Naruto began sneakily, holding a finger up as if in thought. He dove, landing a peck on Sasuke's cheek. "Okay. Bathroom's that way."

Sasuke rubbed his cheek, flushing. "I... don't have anything to change into."

Naruto wiggled his eyebrows. "You could run around in a towel."

"I could also take a pair of scissors to your nuts. Doesn't mean I'm going to do it."

"Did I ever mention the style of manga I write...?"

Sasuke, who had been retreating, stopped. "No."

"I write porn."

Sasuke could have died on the spot. He knew what was coming.

"GAAAAAAY porn."

DEATH. In the end, Sasuke had wrangled some clothes out of Naruto. It was late, but they were sitting in the living area of Naruto's apartment, just talking. Sasuke had a towel around his neck, and was wearing a pair of black shorts and a relatively normal t-shirt, and he would periodically rub at his damp hair with the towel.

"So, then I said to Ino, 'What the hell do you mean, Sai's yours? We all know he's MY bitch!' "Naruto crowed, closing his eyes.

Sasuke let out a laugh himself- It was strange that they both knew Sai, but who was he to complain? Something to talk about.

"Man, remember that prank we all pulled in college?"

Sasuke's eyes widened. "You mean when we-"

"Yeah! When we hung those pictures we took of Kakashi-sensei and Iruka-sensei kissing-"

"All around the campus-"

They finished together- "And they nearly got FIRED, and we blamed it all on Gai-sensei?!" They clutched ribs, laughing hysterically at the shared memory.

Kakashi-sensei still doesn't know it was us!" Naruto shrieked, struggling to breathe. He pounded on the couch, trembling all over.

Tears of laughter were forming in Sasuke's eyes- That was the stupidest thing they'd ever done, but they'd done that stupid thing together.

He found himself scooting closer to the blonde heat source, falling back when Naruto got in a good poke.

"Dobe, that's my stomach! Heh- Stop it, you-" Naruto was a merciless tickler- Sasuke remembered that from sharing a dorm with him. He himself had never been on the receiving end of one of Naruto's attacks, but their fellow dorm-mate Kiba had been on multiple occasions.

"G-get off- eheheh! Naruto- OFF!" Sasuke's eyes were wide- He had just realized that Naruto had him pinned to the couch, in a very compromising position. "DOBE. OFF."

Naruto blinked, twice. Realization dawned on him. "Gay. You're gay."

Sasuke flushed, looked away. He was startled when Naruto slid a hand down his cheek, turned his face back. Their eyes met- Gazes locked.

"You-"

"I-"

"Screw it," Naruto breathed, and without further ado, slid his eyes shut and closed the gap between their lips.

Unsure of what to do, the young Uchiha sat frozen in place. His mind had gone blank, and all he could focus on were the soft warm lips pressed against his own. It felt so good, so right, yet as the last word ran through his mind one thought slapped him hard in the face.

'I'm kissing a GUY!... I'm kissing Naruto!!!'

Sasuke summoned up all of his courage and pushed the blonde off of him.

Naruto hit the ground, hard. "OW. Shit, Sasuke, I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, I dunno what came over me-" He cut off upon realizing Sasuke wasn't listening at all.

The youngest Uchiha had curled up in a ball, trying to sort out his emotions. He had liked kissing Naruto, and the thought disturbed him. He couldn't like kissing Naruto, he wasn't allowed to like kissing Naruto.

Naruto was a GUY. Itachi was already gay, he couldn't be. His parents would be spinning in their graves if they found out the Uchiha name was going to die in such a stupid way.

"Sasuke- Hey, you listening?" A warm hand dropped on his shoulder, startling him.  
"Uh- I'm okay. You just... uh..." Sasuke stumbled over his words, thinking of what he could do right now that wouldn't be awkward.

"Scared you a little?" Naruto's eyes were soft, understanding. "Man, I'm really sorry. That was stupid of me."

"It's not- This is dumb. I do like you. I- just... I can't be gay. Dammit, why now of all times?" Sasuke clenched his hands, then ran one through his hair. It was still damp, and that annoyed him.

"Yeah, this is dumb. I agree. Maybe we just need sleep, it is pretty late. but.." Naruto's eyes drifted to the corner of the room, avoiding Sasuke. "I wouldn't mind... y'know... dating you."

"Sleep first, sexual thoughts - ROMANTIC THOUGHTS later." Sasuke said firmly, cheeks reddening. "I... man."

"I feel like I'm havin' a fourth grade crush all over again." Naruto muttered, chuckling.

"Yeah, " Sasuke sighed, "Thinkin' this one'll be harder to overcome though."

They were both thinking the same thing, though... What if this was more than a crush?

* * *

Now all we need is a cheesy love confession. Next chapter will definitely feature Naruto dancing in his undies.

I swear, it really will. And there will be drama, and lots of 'I have no idea what I'm doing here.'

Remember, reviews make me happy, and don't be afraid to speak your mind.


	3. In which there are censored lemons

YO! We (As in, Akiru, not me) are smart and found a way around the crap that FF's pulling. So much yays, and check out the newest chapter of this weird-ass collab AU!

* * *

The remainder of the night was spent in awkward silence. Both males were deep in thought, each mulling over their current problem.

Sasuke couldn't really have feelings for Naruto, that one wet dream he had about the blonde some years ago reared its ugly head within Sasuke's mind. 

The young Uchiha tried to will it away along with the strange feelings it seemed to come forth at the very thought of having Naruto beneath him, sweaty and moaning his name… 

Sasuke took a careful glance at the other man who sat in the love seat next to the couch he was currently laying on. 

He took in Naruto's slim and toned body. _God, how that must feel to touch and..._ Sasuke mentally slapped himself...

God this was all Itachi's fault. If it wasn't for his gay brother, he would never be questioning his sexual preferences. Or maybe it was just due to the fact that he hadn't been laid in weeks and he was just desperate for some action.

_Or maybe Naruto was just hot and asking for it-_

He was, actually. Naruto had decided to be an asshole upon discovering Sasuke was having... difficulties. 

Naruto was sprawled out in that loveseat; legs spread wide open to stretch his jeans in a mighty dangerous manner. 

_It might be just as nice to be the one doing all the moaning and being topped-_ Sasuke shook his head furiously.

The blonde let out a dramatic sigh, glancing in Sasuke's direction. "I'm lonely," he said simply, stretching his arms over his head. "You're all distant now, you know. It's so stupid, you know."

Sasuke averted his gaze, "Shut up."

"You want me." It wasn't a question. "I want you."

_Like a fucked up version of the Barney song-_ I want you, you want me, let's have butt sex in that tree..._ God, he needed help._

"Pssst." Sasuke jumped, nearly smacking his head into Naruto's- When had the stupid lug gotten so close? 

"I nearly lost you there. What's going on in that pretty little head of yours?" 

The youngest Uchiha glared at him. 

"Oho. Sexual thoughts. Having some fantasy, maybe you topping me in a night of wild passion? I got news for you- I bend over for no one. You, however- Oh, look, you're blushing. How... delightful. I feel evil now." Naruto said gleefully, practically molesting the other man with his eyes. 

"Stop staring at me like that, dobe. Knock it- What are you doing!?" 

Deep blue orbs stared at him- Naruto's hands continued to roam over pale flesh. 

"You... are wearing shorts. How... delectable you look right now." Naruto grinned, giving Sasuke a wild rush that had little to do with the hands sliding up his shirt. "You look innocent. You... look unclaimed. And you know how much I love to claim things." 

_Oh, god. This would not end well. _Sasuke thought, passion beginning to cloud his mind, _I can't-_

"Naruto- Please. Don't." Sasuke mentally screamed at himself- What was he doing? Naruto wanted him, he wanted Naruto, why couldn't they get a little and be cool? "I can't- Get off me." 

"Have I just screwed up majorly?" 

"... no. I'll be honest. I want this. I probably need this. I just can't let myself do this right now- I'm confused." 

"Uhuh. I get it... sorta. So... you want to do the nasty with me, but have some strange idea that you can't?" Naruto was mocking him- that bastard. The blonde was being just as bad as he normally was. 

"Okay. I am going to set some boundaries. You can kiss me. You can push me down on the sofa and begin a sweaty make-out session. You cannot go below the waist without my permission. And you are so not getting me out of my pants." 

"Well, you're currently wearing my pants." 

"You cannot get me out of anything that is covering my ass."

"Damn." Naruto stuck out his lip. "Okay. Terms accepted. So... wanna make out?"

Sasuke was only able to nod his head before his lips were claimed once again by those sensual lips. 

Naruto began at a slow pace, his mouth moving slowly over the Uchiha's, coaxing him to play along in this game that they had begun.

To Sasuke this was everything that he had ever wanted and more, yet that was what scared him... if gave into his own terms as well he knew that he would force fate into motion… and once it had started it would turn and turn out of his control. 

Sasuke didn't like to have things beyond his control. For as long as he could remember, he was always able to have some kind of hold on his life. 

But as Naruto's mouth worked wonders upon his own, he suddenly decided to screw what his mind was say and threw caution to the wind. 

Giving up on his inner battle, Sasuke granted access to Naruto's wandering tongue. 

Naruto couldn't help but grin as he entered the hot, wet cavern that was presented to him. He could not remember how long he had dreamed of feeling the raven's lips pressed against his own. 

The kiss began to grow hotter and hotter, but still Naruto kept his word and his hands stayed firmly on Sasuke's shoulders. 

"Naruto..." Sasuke breathed as he came up for breath for only a moment before diving back in. 

"Hmm..." Naruto mumbled in reply, too engrossed in the make out session. 

"Oh gods..." Sasuke's whole body was growing hotter and hotter, and a warm turning in his lower belly made its presence known.

"Sasuke..." Naruto groaned, "We have to stop-" 

Sasuke bit his lip, breaking the kiss. "Ah..." 

"I'm- Oh man, I don't want to stop, but..." 

"Okay, okay. I want you... to let go of me." 

After a moment's hesitation, the blonde complied. 

"Now, I want those hands... on my ass. Now." 

This time there was no hesitation.

"Stop pinching." Sasuke said firmly, eyes lidded. 

Naruto pouted slightly. "You said."

"My terms apply- I asked for your hands on my ass, not a grope session." 

"Shut up." Naruto crushed his lips against Sasuke's, forcing him down on the couch again. "You talk too much." 

There was silence for a few seconds, save a few wet, smacking noises. And then... 

"Hand." 

"Sorry."

"You bit me. Get off. No biting." Sasuke growled. "I will not have marks."

"Pssh." Naruto responded, "Your lips are swollen. Everyone will know you had something goin' on, a love bite won't give it away."

"Love bite? Oh, that's rich." Sasuke squirmed, "Leggo of my wrists." 

"I'm allowed to leave marks. It's not mentioned in your terms." Naruto grinned cockily, sticking his tongue out. 

Sasuke leaned forward and bit Naruto's tongue.

"OW. You bastard, you are so tickled." The blonde's hands slid to Sasuke's sides, just above his waistline. 

"Get off!" The Uchiha yelled, half-laughing from the assault, half-furious... half enjoying himself. Yes, that was three halves. Sasuke was special. He could have three halves if he wanted. "Stop biting my neck!" 

"Oh, but you like it." Lips pressed against his neck again, suckling the pale flesh. Sasuke groaned, going completely still. "Seeeeee? You like it."

"Nnnn." 

"I think it's cute." 

"I'm not cute." 

"Okay, you're hot."

"Dobe I am not..." Sasuke cut his sentence short. "Ok, I am hot, but still- what right do you have to call me that?" 

Naruto gave him a quick kiss. "Because I am can, and because you are currently at my mercy."

"Like hell I am..." 

Naruto made his point by kissing him passionately, and putting all the kisses before to shame. 

In turn, Sasuke let out a low moan. 'That bastard' He thought as their tongues battled for dominance. He would show that twerp who was at who's mercy. 

Using his strength, Sasuke sat up and push Naruto backwards.

The blond let out a small meep, feeling his back hit the soft cushions of the couch. Ok, so maybe Naruto had been wrong about Sasuke being at his mercy, but still, did that mean he had to take control? 

"Teme, that's no far, I was having fun."

"Hn. Like I am going to let a dobe like you top me."

"Top you??? Like we really were going to do anything that makes it matter who is on top or bottom... what you afraid of being an uke?"

Sasuke blushed, and Naruto giggled.

"You're cute when you blush."

"Damn it Naruto, I am not cute."

"Whatever you say."

Sasuke just huffed as he looked down at the flushed blond. Damn he was hot, almost too hot for Sasuke to resist molesting him right here on the couch.

Thankfully, though Sasuke prided himself for his self-restraint, and merely settled on glaring at Naruto.

"You know you face will end up staying like that, forever stuck in a frown." 

"Fuck you Naruto." 

"Oh please do."

"Inviting me to be on top, are you?"

"Damn." Naruto raised a hand up, showing defeat. "I'm sorry for wanting sex."

"Hn." Sasuke's eyes bored into his, cool orbs of blackness.

"Must you act so... hey, you're still blushing."

_Fuck._ "What's your point?" Sasuke managed, flustered.

"It's adorable. So uke. HEY. Look at your name- It's got 'uke' in it! No wonder you're such a pretty gay man!"

"..." Sasuke's eye twitched- Even more endearing to the blonde, he was sure.

"Hmmm..." Naruto scooted forward on the floor, using the couch to help him up. "You said... in your terms..."

"I said a lot of things in my terms."

"You said I couldn't uncover your ass. You... mentioned nothing about..." Hands slid down Sasuke's back, pulling him forward, and Naruto's warm breath whispered in is ear- "Other... places that pants usually cover..." 

With those words- He was back in control, and Sasuke knew that he was prey to... just about anything.

"Nnn... dobe..."

"Hmm?" Naruto licked the arch of Sasuke's pale neck- He nearly forgot what he was going to say.

"Your hands are on my ass."

Those wandering hands slid around to grasp warm, taut flesh instead, and Sasuke prided himself on not gasping.

"Hnngh-" Well, there goes dignity. 

"Nnn-" Pride was taking a backseat ride here, wasn't it.

Naruto was grinning as he continued to... okay, molest his college friend.

Sasuke's eyes closed briefly- This was too insane. What was holding him back? He couldn't remember, so it must not have been important.

The youngest Uchiha was not a nice person. So when he got whorish... he was cruel.

"Nnn." Sasuke licked his lip, almost innocently, "Those pants are getting mighty constricting, Naruto, from what I can see."

"Don't be mean," Naruto growled, nipping the brunette's ear. Sasuke, this time, did not hold back: he moaned, loudly.

Naruto's breath hitched.

"I win..." Sasuke whispered, cocking his head to expose his neck, "Right?" 

"Yeah, yeah, you win the battle, but I'm gonna win the war and get me a commonwealth!"

"You're gonna have to get those clothes off first."

Sasuke tugged at the hem of Naruto's shirt: the blonde shimmied out of it faster than he would've thought possible.

"Oh, Sasuke!" Naruto sing-songed, "Shirt off, pants next! Now it's your turn to start getting nakkie." 

"What are we, four?"

"Uh- Add twenty years, and we get a little closer. We... are men. And we are men that sleep with other men. So take your clothes off so we can be us." 

_Can't argue with that logic. _

Naruto couldn't help the smirk that spread across his face as he watched Sasuke's hand begin to undo the first few buttons of his dress shirt. 'I knew he wouldn't last long.' He smugly stated to himself.

Sasuke on the other hand was nervous beyond reason, although he would never admit it.

Sure he was acting cool and collect on the outside... well as cool as you can with a sexy blond in front of you, but he couldn't really be blamed.

This was his first time having any kind of sexual encounter with a being of the same sex... unless you count that hermaphrodite that he dated. To say the least that end in a nasty shock that left Sasuke scared for weeks.

Needless to say, he had heard many things from his brother, yet Itachi had a bad habit of stretching the truth and making things as twisted as he could.

Although Sasuke new the simple mechanics of it all, and the fact that it hurt to be the uke. To say the least, Sasuke was hell bent on being the seme. He wasn't one to bend over for anyone, not even the cute blond at this moment in time.

Naruto's ass would be his and not the other way around.

Sasuke stared at his hands when he realized that he had come to the last button. Giving it one last look, he undid it and removed his shirt, letting fall to the ground in a forgotten heap.

"Hmmm... now we are getting somewhere... now come the pants." Naruto almost purred as he licked his lips hungrily.

"Nn- Stop it," Sasuke said half-heartedly, his hands coming to rest not on his own pants, but on those of Naruto. "I'm not being dominated."

"Oh yes you are." Naruto smirked, "Look, I am being on top. Maybe next time, Sas-uke."

Sasuke frowned. "Next time?"

"Yes. Next time."

The Uchiha bit his lip; it wasn't that he didn't believe the blonde- he was scared still.

That was, until Naruto's lips pressed against his again, hands tangled in each other's hair as they pressed against each other.

"Excited, aren't you Sasuke..." Naruto murmured, low tone sending shivers through Sasuke's spine. "Be a good boy and take your pants off."

The brunette nearly smacked himself; his hands automatically dropped to obey that commanding tone. Naruto had some strange power over him; he would never be on top at this rate.

Naruto also had a thing for necks, Sasuke realized dimly, and he himself had a thing for neck bites. He squirmed and groaned in pleasure as Naruto dropped his lips to his neck again.

"Okay, I am taking the pants off." Sasuke informed him, "So stop that- Nnn."

Naruto grinned, managing that evil-hot look. Sasuke bit his nose, agitated despite being ungodly turned on.

"Oooh, that was kinky."

"Do you want these pants off or what?"

"Yes dear."

Sasuke merely gave him a look, one that clearly said 'I am going to kill you after this is over,' and returned to unbuttoning his jeans. It was no easy task, seeing as he was harder than he had perhaps ever been in his life.

Naruto was watching him avidly. "Can I _help_?"

"Oh, you're going to be _helping_ soon enough. You- Get your pants off."

"You are remarkably like a woman. Bossy bossy bossy. Oh-"

Sasuke was suddenly blushing again- The blonde was staring at him, turned on and in nothing but a pair of boxers, with the hungry gaze of a predator.

"This... is going to be very, very fun."

Sasuke flushed at the sight in front of him. Gods if he had any doubts, they were now gone. All that filled his head now were dirty thoughts of things that could be done to the blond. Even his nervousness had slipped away just as his pants had down his hips.

They spilled to the floor in a pile, leaving the Uchiha clad in only his boxers.

"My, my, aren't we sporting a nice package." Naruto licked his lips, letting his eyes roam over the man.

Sasuke felt the sudden need to cover himself.

'Stupid modesty having to kick in now. Hell when HAVE I ever been modest?' Sasuke cursed himself. He was going to end up making a follow of himself in front of Naruto. What the hell was with him?

While deep in thought Sasuke did not notice the sudden close proximity of the blond, nor did he notice the hand until...

"Shit... Na..Naru...to" He gasped out as a slim hand cupped his hardened erection.

Naruto smiled at his friend's reaction.

"Sasuke, you're so hard. You really should do something about this."

"Bastard... ah... mnn..." Naruto gave Sasuke a squeeze, his grin growing by the minute.

And why was Naruto still in his underwear? Not cool.

Naruto proceeded to spin around, showing off. He shimmied halfway across the room, shaking his boxer-clad ass.

Sasuke groaned. "Get over here, you ass!"

"Mm, it seems you want something." Naruto shook his head, grinning, and waltzed back.

Sasuke bit his lip. The idiot had to dance in his underwear, didn't he?

"You look so girly right now, Sasuke, despite being ass naked."

And then it came to him- There was no way they wouldn't squabble. Even over the stupidest things, they'd always be fighting, like... Sasuke flushed, like a married couple.

"I'm going to make you eat those words." Sasuke growled, making Naruto laugh.

"Or I could eat something else."

The Uchiha prided himself in not shivering. Naruto just had to be so freaking hot, didn't he?

"Y'know, as much as I'm loving the boxers, they have to go." He finally said.

Naruto frowned. "But I like them. They're my only 'PWNED' boxers."

He was right; the black boxer shorts had red lettering, outlined in yellow, on the seat of them that read "PWNED!!!"

"Take them off. NOW."

"It's not like you're going to be doing any fucking."

"Not this again- Nnnnn." Sasuke groaned as he was pushed into the couch. Naruto has his boxers down, right off his hips- Just enough to fuck, but not enough to be fucked. He was not winning this fight- Sasuke was bottom, there wasn't an argument.

"Damn." Naruto slid off him, fished under the couch for something. "Aha!" He pulled out a tube of something- Sasuke leaned forward to see.

"What kind of a weirdo keeps lube under his couch?"

"The smart kind."

"Can't argue." Sasuke shrugged- Only to be pinned down again. His pride weakly protested the treatment, but the majority of him didn't care- Naruto was practically fucking him with his eyes, and- What was wrong with him- it was nice.

Naruto popped the cap off the lube, grinning like a maniac. "Who rocks?"

"I do."

"Heeeeey. Not the right answer. Okay, who fucks?"

"One of us."

"I nominate myself. Voting time! Oh, I'm the only candidate. I win!"

"That election was rigged!" Sasuke protested, laughing despite himself. The laugh twisted to a gasp- Naruto could be just as mean as he was. "If you don't pull that finger out right now and replace it with something else, I'm going to kill you."

"Patience, patience." Another finger- Sasuke squirmed, wanting more but not wanting to sound like... a whore? They scissored- Sasuke gasped.

"That hurts-" And then it didn't- The intruding fingers brushed... something. He moaned, nearly climaxing right there.

"I found something pokeable, didn't I?" Naruto grinned, pressing his fingers against the spot.

Sasuke's entire body shuddered; he barely held himself in check. "That's my ass you find so pokeable," he gasped, shaking. "Stop tha- Nnnn... Ah... Nevermind, keep doing it."

"You are so fucked." Naruto drawled, pulling his fingers out. "Just about now."

Sasuke's mind was in a flutter, all coherent thought had left and he had buried his earlier conditions, aka stay above the waist, in a ten foot pile. He wanted Naruto and he wanted him now!

**_HOMG LEMONY-MANSEX. _**

Catching his breath, Naruto collapsed on top of Sasuke, completely spent.

"Hmmm... That was good..."

Sasuke smiled. "Hn..." Sleep was soon over taking him. Many thought were running through his mind, and he knew in the morning the consequences of his action would hit him head on. But that was tomorrow and tonight he would enjoy the warmth of Naruto's body next to his.

* * *

Whoo, lemons! Lemons lemons lemons!

As I said in chapter 1, Akriu chan is posting the raw version of this, in all its man-sex-y glory. So go check it out if you want the yumness. Same name, author Akiru chan.

Remember, reviews are my happy crack. And are far less dangerous than any other drug.


	4. In which the plot still is not there

I know what you're thinkin'- 'Another chapter? Already?'

Well, I dunno if I mentioned it, but FF is being stupid. There's this whole process involved in gtting a new document up. Which we figured out only recently. So we were writing this chapter while tryin' to figure out how to get the last one up. Anyways, enjoy!

* * *

Sasuke awoke with a start. He was... warm. That was the first hint that something was off- It was the middle of winter, and his heater was broken. (Again.) Why was he warm?

The youngest Uchiha blinked, several times, as he assessed his surroundings. Not... his room. Where was he?

_Oh yeah. Dobe. He let me stay over and we-_ Sasuke leapt to his feet- Not a smart move. At least he was on the floor. But now he didn't have anything covering- His cheeks felt like they were on fire.

_Sticky feelings- FUCK, we didn't even get cleaned up. This is so... gaaah! My ass... is killing me..._

His frantic motions brought Naruto out of his stupor- The blonde rubbed at one eye, clearly not a morning person. "Howdy sunshine," he slurred, clearly having realized what had happened about twice as fast as Sasuke. "How's life? You look distressed."

"How do you think life is!?!" Sasuke practically yelled back, yanking a blanket over his 'sensitive areas.' He sat down again, feeling the protest from his backside but not caring. "Do you have ANY idea what we did?"

"Mmm. Yup." Naruto stretched out, rolling over onto his stomach. "I am naked. You are naked and sticky. I know exactly what we did."

"WHY ARE YOU SO CALM?!?"

"Hmmm... if I say 'because' will you shoot me?"

"Yes."

"Uh-huh. Then... 'cause it was very fun. And I wouldn't mind doing that again sometime."

Sasuke sat very still, mulling that over. And then...

"YOU FRIGGIN' ASSHOLE!"

Ah. Life was good. Naruto rolled over, cracking his neck.

SMACK

Naruto groaned, rubbing his face. "Did you just bitch slap me?"

"No. I smacked you. Bitch slapping is for women. Hence the 'bitch'."

"You just bitch slapped me."

"Ass."

The blonde grinned. "It hurts, doesn't it?"

"What?" Sasuke spluttered, flushing.

"Your ass. I bet it's on FIRE."

The brunette glared at him, managing to promise the most painful death imaginable without saying a word.

"By the way... that your phone ringing? I think I hear Beethoven."

"FUCK." Sasuke scrambled for his pants, digging his phone out.

Naruto, meanwhile, as Sasuke answered, stood up and rooted around for his discarded boxers.

"H-hai- Wait, what? No, I mean- I'm fine. At a... friend's place. You sound hung over. Mm. Yeah, I'm fine, I said. I dunno. I'll drop off the crap you wanted. Aniki, I'm tired. Will you just- Yeah." He paused, reaching up to scratch his chin absentmindedly. "No. Well... I guess I'll be seeing you. Yeah. Bye." Sasuke sighed, "Oy, dobe. What time is it? My phone's time is off."

"Uh..." Naruto glanced at the digital clock on his mantle, "It's almost noon."

"WHAT!?!" Sasuke practically shrieked, "I have a JOB, remember? No wonder Aniki was wondering where the hell I was..."

"Oh, chill. You seem like the kinda guy who never uses up his sick days."

Naruto was right- That made him furious.

"I'm taking a shower." Sasuke spat, ticked off beyond belief. "You had better not try to follow me."

"Damn. You know me too well."

"I lived with you for four years, give or take."

"Meh."

Sasuke smirked at Naruto's pouting face. That dobe never seemed to grow up; he would forever have a mind of a five year old. The brunette shook his head at the thought. That was the last thing he should be thinking about after being screwed by the guy last night.

"Here." Naruto tossed a pile of clothes down at the Uchiha's feet. "There yours... unless you don't want them, cause you know I am perfectly happy watching to waltz around in the nude."

"Ass." Sasuke snapped, clutching the blanket around himself tighter as he pick up his clothes.

"Go take a shower, teme. I will wait for ya... and no I won't sneak in... ok maybe for a peak."

"Naruto!"

"I'm kidding, jeez. You have no sense of humor."

"I hardly find you funny." Naruto just stuck his tounge out.

Sasuke in turn ignored his immature behavior and headed to the shower. 'Shit' He cursed, as his ass ached with every step he took.

"You're limping... you know that right?" He heard Naruto call from the living room.

Sasuke decided to ignore it and shut the bathroom door, making sure to look it as well.

---------------------------------

The shower had been very refreshing. He was now completely awake, and standing in front of the mirror to make sure all was in line. That was when he saw it. Yet it soon turned to them, and Sasuke wanted to smash something.

There, placed in plain view of his neck were numerous hickies and bite marks. He could not believe it.

Hadn't he told the blond not to leave marks? Then again, if memory served right he didn't fight against Naruto's attack on his neck, but that was beside the point.

Feeling his anger rising to unknown heights, Sasuke stormed out of the bathroom, intent on giving Naruto a good ass kicking.

That plan quickly backfired- Each storming step he took sent little aches up to his abused backside. He settled on walking out very calmly, stepping up to the blonde- Who, he was annoyed to see, still hadn't dressed, except for those ridiculous boxers... and grabbing him by the light scattering of chest hair.

"OWOWOWOWOW WHAT!?!? Oooh, pretty bite marks. Are those from me?" Naruto attempted to dislodge the pissed Uchiha from his fuzz, to no avail. "I need that. Okay, I don't, but I like it."

Sasuke twisted the blonde hair in his grasp, smirking. "You. Left. Marks. You sonovabitch, you left marks."

Naruto made a pathetic gurgling noise. "Ow. I think we've established thaAAAAT! Stop pulling, stop pulling! That HURTS!"

"... My brother. Will NEVER let me live it down. I cannot believe you. I am going to cut your balls off." Sasuke said ominously, eyes almost glowing with rage, "With blunt scissors, and I will gut you. With a SPOON."

"... Why a spoon? OWOWOWOWOW."

"It's blunt. It'll hurt more." Sasuke said with a demonic smirk, yanking once more.

"You could wear a turtleneck- OW. I could lend you one- Stoppit you ass!"

Sasuke tilted his head, exposing the bite mark that accented his jawbone. "Ahem."

"Well, your bangs hide that."

"Okay. I am going to let go of... this. Then, you are going to walk to your closet, or whatever you keep your clothes in, and you are going to get me a turtleneck. You are never going to mention his to anyone. You are not allowed to brag."

"And I get what out of this?" Naruto said flatly, fearing for his fuzz.

"You get to keep your chest hair, your dignity, and your life. And you will probably get more really great sex."

"No shit?"

"No shit."

"Sasuke, we have a deal. Pookie." Naruto grinned.

Sasuke, about to let go of the blonde hairs still in his grasp, gave them a parting tug. "No pet names."

"You have Dobe for me."

"You have Teme."

"Usuratonkachi."

"Sasu-chan."

"Huh. I think we're even. Okay, no Pookie. we have a deal, Sasu-chaaaaan."

"Oy. Not necessary." Sasuke said with a sigh, hiking up his towel. "Shirt please."

"What, and give up this view? Okay, okay. A deal's a deal." Naruto sighed, retreating into another room. "Hmmm... Orange turtleneck! Whoo!"

"No orange!" Sasuke yelled back at him.

"Nah, that's what I'm wearing. Black for you. Emo boy."

"I'm not emo!"

"I know. But you look good in black."

Sasuke made a sound that was almost a growl, but lacked some menace.

"By the way- Did you hear about Shikamaru?"

"What?" That caught Sasuke's attention- Shikamaru had been one of the only sensible people in college. "What about him?"

"Gaara's sister. Y'know, Gaara."

"The transfer student we had for about... two, three months?"

"Yeah. Shikamaru's sleeping with his sister."

"I thought Ino-"

"Nah. He's too smart for her. You know women- Can't stand being in a relationship with a smart man, you can't manipulate them. Temari, though, she's smart. Granted, not as smart as Shikamaru- Did you know he's got a doctorate these days?"

"Seriously? I thought he'd be too lazy."

"Apparently not," There was a skidding noise. "Ow. That hurt."

"I hope you fell on your ass." Sasuke called, combing through his hair with his fingers.

"Nah, stubbed my toe." Naruto bounced back into view- Now wearing a fresh pair of jeans.

_Damn_.

Naruto threw the black turtleneck at Sasuke, who caught quite easily. 'Great its wool, I hate wool. I am going to be itching all day.' At this point, he knew his day couldn't get worse, not that it was bad in the first place, but hey it was getting there.

"I'll be back."

"Where are you going?"

Sasuke held out the turtleneck and pointed to the bathroom. "I don't know if you noticed but I am wearing nothing but a towel and would like to be full clothed."

"Oh I noticed alright, but I really don't see the need for you to wear clothes. You look better without them." Naruto licked his lips suggestively.

Sasuke blushed, and turned away, limping back into the bathroom.

Naruto just giggled and proceeded to get dressed.

Inside the bathroom, Sasuke cursed the blond, but also thanked him for at least solving the 'hicky problem'. If he could get through this day without anyone finding out about the hidden marks than he would serve himself on a platter for the blond.

Yes, that was over the top, but Itachi finding out was like being a cat that was thrown into a box filled with rabid dogs. Itachi would rip him apart, not physically but mentally. Sometimes he thought physical pain would be more humane.

Finally clothed, Sasuke searched around in his pockets to make sure his keys and phone were in place. He found them, but while searching he came across what felt like a small piece of paper.

Pulling it out of his pants, he opened it to find scrawled out in messy hand writing a number, followed by a name.

"Naruto" He said softly, a smile spreading across his face. "When did he sneak that in there?" He would have to ask him later.

"Aaah. Itchy- Fuck." Sasuke muttered to himself, pulling the neck out of the shirt. He resisted the impulse to rub against a wall to rid himself of the itchy feeling.

"Oh Sasu-chaaaaan! You want something to eat?" Naruto called to him- Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"No ramen!"

"Bastard!"

"Bite me!" Sasuke yelled, before realizing that Naruto would have no issues with doing just that.

"Gladly! Open the door first."

"... Got any Pocky?"

"Hrm... Yes. Never knew you had a soft spot for the stuff. I should stock up on it."

"What flavor?" Sasuke wiggled into his slacks- His legs were still wet, so they gave him a bit of trouble.

"I got lots. Chocolate, strawberry, hey, I've even got green tea." Naruto sounded puzzled, "Don't remember getting that. Eh. Oh well."

"Hmm." Sasuke opened the door again, and Naruto threw several boxes of the snack on the coffee table they had... made out on. Awkward...

The brunette prided himself on not diving. Pocky was his secret addiction- Although now Naruto knew about it.

Sasuke did, however, make a beeline for the table. He ripped open the box with a flourish, taking out three sticks and munching on them absentmindedly. Naruto stared at him intently.

"... what?" Sasuke eventually snapped, breaking a stick of the stuff in his hand.

"I never knew eating Pocky could be so erotic."

"Shut up!" Sasuke snarled, a stick of Pocky perched on his lip.

"Meh. It's true. Hey Sasuke?"

"... what?"

"What's it like to always have a stick up your ass?"

"I'm going to strangle you."

"Okay, okay. Seriously though, why are you always so uptight? I mean, last night was... uh... well, you... were like, relaxed for once. Well, you weren't, but, it was like... Hold on, I need to figure out how to word this. It's like you weren't afraid to show emotion. Or something."

Sasuke nibbled the flavoring off the Pocky, thinking. "It's... I... don't want to tell you why."

"Okay. I get it. Keep your secrets. I don't need to know." Naruto turned away, puttering around in his kitchenette. He stopped, went over to the couch. He sat down, looked Sasuke right in the eyes.

_Dammit. He's not guilt-tripping me, but now I want to tell him._ "It's... I've been hurt a lot in the past because I used to wear my heart on my sleeve."

Naruto was very quiet. Listening. Sasuke, unurged, went on.

"I don't like that. So I always figured 'If they don't know what I'm feeling, they can't use my emotions against me.' Because people aren't understanding. They can't read minds, they don't know what really bothers you deep down, gives you that sick feeling in your gut."

"I don't really understand. I mean, sure, people have taken some emotions of mine, and they've twisted them into a sick joke... but you stopped showing your feelings so they couldn't do that?"

"... yes." Hearing it echoed by Naruto, Sasuke realized how stupid it was.

"... okay... Well... I like making you feeling. It's a great feeling, to know that I've given you so much emotion that you can't help but to show it. It's really cool. I dunno. That sounds stupid."

"But I get it. So does it really matter if the way you word it sounds funny?"

"Nope!"

Sasuke let a rare smile spread across his face. He felt so much calmer now.

It was weird how letting that out to Naruto made everything feel just a little bit better.

Taking another stick of Pocky out of the box, he began to think. Maybe he could loosen up a bit, or at least he could around Naruto.

"Naruto..."

"Do you have plans for today?" Naruto shook his head.

"Wanna do something?"

Naruto's eyes widened. "But you have work."

"Yeah but you are right I have sick days and I should use them, besides I don't think I could stand sitting all day long with my butt in it current... umm... condition." He finished, a shy expression on his face.

"You mean it?"

"Yeah."

Naruto jumped up, startling Sasuke. "Yes! This is going to be so much fun!" The blonde continued to jump around the room and Sasuke began to rethink his plan. Maybe taking the dobe out wasn't such a good idea. The again the warm smile Naruto just threw his way just made it worth it.

"So Sasuke where should we go?"

_Anywhere that I won't be recognized at…_ He said mentally before responding. "Where would you like to go?"

"Weeeeeell... we could... damn. What to do. What to do... Erm... I just got this horrible image of these cute-i-fied versions of us doing the classic flower-field run thing. Ugh. You can't run, so scratch that."

Sasuke chuckled, then swore. "You got the image stuck in my head!"

"Hahaha. We could... jeez. Let's get ice cream!"

"Have a certain place in mind?"

"... oh yes. Yes I do."

Sasuke was unsure as to why that struck so much fear into his heart.

* * *

Something's happening... oooooh. 

Okay, well, you know the drill, reviewgood!


	5. In which there is sorrow, and separation

This chapter's a doosy- Warning, happy snuggle lovers, there will be angst. TURN BACK NOW, IT'S NOT TOO LATE. Haha.

* * *

The ice cream shop of Naruto's choosing happened to be in walking distance of his apartment. 

Outside the sun was beating down and a cool breeze blew by. In short, it was a beautiful day, and Naruto couldn't help making his happiness for the weather none. 

"Ah! It's wonderful out, isn't it Sasu-chan!" 

Sasuke frowned at the pet name but nodded his head in agreement. 

"Perfect day to eat ice cream, ne?" 

"Hn." 

"Not a cloud in the sky!" 

"Hn." 

"The birds are chirping!" 

"Hn." 

"And the Teme has a limited vocabulary." 

"Hn... Wait What?" Sasuke turned to the blond who was now frowning. 

"Man, can you be any quieter? I seriously wonder sometimes if 'Hn' is the only word you know... or is it just your favorite... In all the years I have known you I think I have heard you say 'hn' more times than the number of ramen bowls I have eaten in the past five years, and that is saying something." 

"Dobe, shut up." Naruto grumbled but followed the Uchiha's command or at least for a few minutes. 

"So what is your favorite ice cream?" 

"Vanilla." 

"Huh? Oh, come on Sasuke, that's so boring... How about rocky road... birthday cake? Let's see... Banana split... Cookies and cream?" 

"No, vanilla."

"Cookie dough? Mint chocolate?" 

"Vanilla. Get it through your thick skull." Sasuke stopped, looked up. "Oh hell no." 

"Whaaaaat?" Naruto said, following Sasuke's gaze. "Oh." 

Sasuke was staring, horrified, at the sign of the shop in front of them. 

"Here we are, the Akimichi Ice Cream Parlor!" 

"We're going back." 

"Nope. We're here, and we're getting ice cream." Naruto grinned, grabbing Sasuke by the arm as he turned to flee. 

"Dobe- Let me go- I'm not going in there!" Sasuke flailed his other arm, digging his heels in as he attempted to not be dragged. 

"Oh, Sasu-chan, stop it, you're making a scene." Naruto drawled, tugging insistently. "Oy, Chouji! Open up shop, you have friendly... one friendly customer, and one grumpy one!"

_Shoot me please, God, smite me down for I have sinned... don't let my gay lover drag me into this shop. Homosexuality is a sin according to the bible, right? I have SINNED... It was nice though. Most fun I've had sinning- I mean- SMITE ME LORD._

--------------------- 

"So how's life been, Chouji?" Naruto was asking, all three scoops of his triple-fudge-Oh-my-god-it's-so-rich-it'll-kill-you-dead chocolate ice cream temporarily forgotten. 

"About the same as always," their pudgy former classmate responded, glancing nervously at Sasuke. "So what brings you to our shop? Not that I mind, business is good..." 

"Oh, mopey over there spent the night, and he's playing hooky from work. So I decided' Where better to go than Chouji's wicked cool ice cream place?' It's yummy and avoided by anyone Sasuke knows!" 

"Hn." Sasuke said, fingers interlaced under his chin. "Dobe, your ice cream's dripping." 

"Oh, fudge." Naruto punned, licking the cone before any of the ice cream could hit his jeans. 

"Yeah, it is." Chouji beamed, "Where've you been? You haven't stopped by in forever. I should know- You always buy so much ice cream." 

"Ehehe. I've been low on cash, couldn't indulge in the yum." 

Sasuke sighed. "You don't need to guilt trip. I'll pay, since you're hiding me from... ahem. Anyways." 

"Ooooh, Sasu-chan, you have ice cream on your nose." Naruto said, wicked grin in place. 

"Please don't." 

"Nah, I want to. It's no trouble." Naruto leaned over the table - Chouji made a noise that Sasuke couldn't identify- and licked the smudge of vanilla off the Uchiha. 

"I said don't." 

"D-did you just LICK Sasuke?" 

"Yes. Did so many times last night too." 

"..." Sasuke let out a heavy sigh. "You just had to say it." 

"... yeah. D'oh shit, I broke the terms of sex, didn't I?" 

"Yeah."

Chouji looked between his two college friends confused for a moment, but it was soon replaced with a wide grin. 

"You two..." He pointed to both Naruto and Sasuke, "Did the naughty?" 

Naruto nodded, Sasuke sighed. 

That was all Chouji had to hear before breaking into a hysterical fit of laughter. 

"Hey it's not that funny." Naruto mumbled. 

"Oh yes it is, and it about time... I was beginning to think we would loose the bet. I so have to call Shika!" Chouji went to stand, but a strong arm pulled him back to his chair. 

Turning around, he was met by a pair of onyx eyes. 

"What the hell did you just say?" 

Chouji laughed nervously. "Well... you see... funny thing is... back in college... all of us kinda had... this thing... kinda like... a bet... that you two would end up screwing each other at some point... Oh and by the way who was the seme?" 

Sasuke's glare intensified at that, yet Naruto happily answered, much to Sasuke's dismay. 

"I was!" He said joyously. 

"Awww... well that sucks... I had my money on you Uchiha." Chouji grumbled, "Why did you have to wimp out and give your ass to the little blond?" 

That was it, Sasuke was at his limit, "For your information I didn't have much of a choice, despite it feeling fucking great, Naruto better watch his ass cause it will be mine next ti... time..." Sasuke let his sentence fade as he realized what he was saying... 

"Oh this is priceless... hold on..." 

Sasuke was faintly aware of a beeping noise, until he heard Chouji give a greeting. Looking over at the plump man, he saw him talking on his cell. Yup things could get worse.

Naruto was on the floor, cracking up- Now, apparently, it was funny. "I win, bitch, I win." 

"I am not your bitch!" Sasuke yelled, loud enough to be picked up by the cell. A burst of hysterical laughter came spilling from Chouji's lips. 

"Shikamaru, did you hear that? Okay, okay, I'm putting Naruto on." The cell was ceremoniously handed to Naruto, who responded to his barrage of questions in a drawl. 

"Yeah, I fucked Mr. Tight-ass. Y'know, he really is. It's not something you can say with so much feeling until you know exactly how tight- Yeah, TMI. Although he's probably not so much of a tight-ass anymore. I really worked the dude ove- Oh yes. I do need to tell you this." Naruto paused, listened. He began to laugh. "You know him too well. He's totally swearing vengeance. I think he's jealous of his girly brother. I hope not- Why do you think? I'd feel so used. Dude, Shikamaru. He makes the most wicked noises during sex. I'm taping it next time, I swear. OW!" The blonde yelled, whimpering as Sasuke took the phone from him. 

"Naruto- What'd he do? Did he kick you?" Shikamaru's voice came from the cell, frantic and laughing. 

"In the nuts." Sasuke drawled, leaning back in his chair. 

"Oh. Hi... SasUKE." 

"Shut up, lazy-ass. I know for a fact that Temari's working you over." 

"Damn. Naruto told you about that?" 

Sasuke ran a hand through his hair. "Spent the night, dude. I know pretty much everything,"

There was a snicker from Chouji. "Gaaaaay..." He muttered. 

"Shut up, fat boy." Sasuke froze as the words left his lips. "Uh... Hey Shikamaru, we'll catch up later, I think Chouji's about to beat me the hell up. Dude!" This was addressed to Chouji, who was sitting very, very still, "I know it's all muscle! You aren't fat!" 

_Liiiiiies. It's not all muscle, but a good deal of it is._

"Naruto, take the phone back. I'm gonna run." 

"You can't run, stupid, I fucked you-" 

"NO SHIT. I'm still gonna try!" 

"Stupid!" 

"I know!" 

"Okay, Chouji. Let's make a deal! We buy a shitload of ice cream, and you don't beat Sasuke up!" 

Chouji glared at him, "How much ice cream can you afford?" 

Sasuke dug through his wallet. "How 'bout $300's worth?" 

"You have a deal. I will never be this nice again." 

"Yes you will." Naruto muttered under his breath. 

"I heard that." 

"Yup. You're a good person, Chouji. Hey, tell Neji next time he stops by that he owes me money." 

Chouji's eyebrows rose, nearly meeting his hairline. "Neji owes you money?" 

"Uh-huh. There's a really long story involving relationships. But anyways. Not important. Who wins the bet, then?" 

Chouji glanced at Sasuke, who was calculating expenses on a napkin, "Er. Let's see... Kiba was hell-bent that you were both straight... Shino said you might casually date, but nothing serious... Erm. Shikamaru thought you'd... well, Shikamaru won, I think. Oh, Temari won. Shikamaru said you'd be on top, and Temari said you'd be seme and blab within 12 hours." 

Naruto chortled, "She knows too much. She's too much like me, I guess. Okay. Well, fork over Shikamaru's number. He's been avoiding my emails." 

Chouji grinned, and stole a napkin from the small pile Sasuke had. He pulled a pen from the pocket of his apron, and scrawled a number down. "Don't worry- He figures checking caller ID is too troublesome, so he always picks up, seeing as at any point his mother could call." 

"The Wicked Bitch- I mean Witch?"

Naruto grinned at Shikamaru's comment. Naruto only had the honor of meeting the woman once, but once was enough. Mrs. Nara had a fire within her that seemed to keep her boys in line. 

"Here." Chouji handed over the napkin over to Naruto who placed it in his pocket. 

"Ha, now you can't ignore me anymore, Shika." 

"I heard that." Came the reply over the phone. 

Naruto chuckled, finally turning back to face a fuming Uchiha. 

"Are you all done now?" He now knew his life was over. By this time tomorrow, everyone would know about the happenings of last night. 

Shikamaru might not be a loud mouth, but Temari would be sure to hear about it, and Sasuke knew how girls talked. 

It would be all over town and... Hell, his brother would know. Yup, Sasuke could kiss his nice, quiet life good bye. Itachi would not let him live it down. 

After all Sasuke had always prided himself on being straight… so much for that now. 

"Sasuke, are you alright?" Sasuke began to look sick, or Naruto thought so. 

"Yeah, just thinking of the living hell that is awaiting me in the near future." 

Naruto raised an eyebrow. 

"How so?"

"Trust me, it's better you not know." Naruto would get a piece of his hell as well. Itachi would be sure to pick on the blonde as well. _He just better not hit on him._ Sasuke growled at the thought.

"Your brooooother gonna give you trouble?"

Sasuke glared at him. Naruto saw that he should take the hint and shut up, but didn't.

"He's so gay. What'd you say his boyfriend's name was?"

"Dobe. Silence."

Shikamaru's laughter echoed around the room, then cut off. "Ow. Temari, stop hitting me."

"Girlfriend got your balls?"

"Yeah. I'll… see you guys around. Maybe. Fuck, Temari, not now!"

"Oooh. Kinky." Naruto drawled, hearing a yelp as the phone connection cut.

"Temari's just like his mother," Chouji said, eyes closed. "I feel for him, but I can't pity him."

"So he's dating a woman just like his mum. There's a word for that…" Sasuke cut off. "Damn. O… Oedipal? Yeah."

"Man that's weird."

"You hear about Kiba?" Chouji slurred, "THAT is weird."

"I don't wanna know!" Naruto and Sasuke chorused in unison, stopping to blink at each other. Chouji let out bar of laughter.

"You two should get married."

Sasuke turned beet red- He didn't even know what to say to that, no snappy comment came to mind. Naruto, however, turned slightly pink and said, "Well, I don't think that's legal in this state."

"Yes it is." Chouji informed him.

"Oh. Well. Not a good idea."

"I can't get married to a guy." Sasuke recovered quickly, "It'd be stupid. Well. Damn. Not stupid. I… don't know."

"Sasuke is afraid of commitment," Naruto told Chouji, "But keep that confidential."

"Oh I see? Afraid to take the plunge Uchiha?" Chouji joked, but quickly feel quiet and the look that was directed towards him. 

"I am not afraid of commitment. There is just no point in marrying a guy." He said, not noticing the hurt look on Naruto's face. 

"Not even if you love them." 

"No, not even..." he cut himself off, he really was being immature about the whole thing, but he felt as if there was still something he had to prove. His Uchiha pride was at stake. 

"I see..." Was Naruto's reply. 

Sasuke felt his heart break at the sight of the blonde. He had seen Naruto upset before but it had never been like this. Sasuke had never been the one to cause it. Yes, he had made the blond mad many times before but he had never caused such an expression to fall on the blondes face. 

"Naruto... Naru-chan..." He tried, hoping the pet name would help. "I didn't mean it... it's just this is all new to me... I am not used to it," he tried.

"I get it," Naruto said quietly. "Y'know, Chouji, Sakura's hounding me about deadlines. I should probably just go." 

"Yeah..." The pudgy man said uncertainly, "See you around." 

Sasuke refused to look at Naruto as he exited. _What did I just do..._

Chouji gave him a look. It was almost pitying, but highly disapproving. "I hope you know you've just screwed up majorly." 

"'m not good with relationships." Sasuke held his face in his hands, "... he... we've only been together for like, 6 hours, and I've already ruined it. Granted, he shouldn't be thinking about getting married, but..." His breath hitched- tears burned in his eyes. 

Something he had always heard from Ino and Shikamaru, yet never believed up until this moment, was that Chouji was like a giant teddy bear. He was like a big, warm, source of comfort when you were feeling sad, and never, but never teased you about it. He was pure empathy. 

Sasuke had always figured that they were exaggerating, as Chouji was so close to them. 

He discovered now, tears spilling from his eyes, that they were telling the truth.

* * *

Review and give Sasuke a hug! Because he's in deep shit now. glare Bad gay man. Your brother is disappointed. 

Not that I'm lucky enough to be Itachi.

Akiru says 'Hi' to everyone, and... stuff. Don't worry, we'll make things work out! Maybe...


	6. In which there is squishy romance

Yaaaay, isn't being evil anymore. So here it is, the next chapter. A little short, but sweet.

* * *

Naruto ran, to where he did not know, nor did he care. He knew that he was being foolish and to not take Sasuke's words to heart. He was a bastard and Naruto knew that, yet it stung somewhere deep within his heart. 

He had loved Sasuke for so long and so much. When they had graduated from college Naruto seriously thought he would not be able to make it without him. He had made it, but a day didn't go by when he didn't think about the Uchiha.

And now the heavens had seemed to smile upon him, when he bumped into Sasuke the other day. Once more, they had actual made love last night and everything was going so well.

Naruto knew Sasuke was having problems excepting the fact that he was starting to date a man, but still it hurt to hear Sasuke practical condemn same sex marriages.

Ok so maybe he was thinking ahead a little too far. Naruto blinked away his tears. He shouldn't have left like he had, what Sasuke must think of him right now.

"I bet he thinks I am a real dobe for sure." He sniffed out.

Little did he know, the Uchiha was beating himself up just as much.

"Can't believe I was so stupid!" He raged at himself, comforted little by Chouji at this point. "I completely fucked up- He's never going to want to talk to me again, is he?"

"Naruto- He's complex," Chouji offered, calming Sasuke down a bit, "He doesn't hate you. I bet he's just as confused as you are- I mean, you had sex, and then you practically say it's never going to go anywhere."

"No I didn't-"

"Yes you did. You said you'd never marry a guy. That's telling Naruto that you'll never have more than casual relations."

"..." Said the Uchiha. "... I should think before I speak. Normally that's Naruto's problem, but..."

"Naruto's complicated. You should know that better than anyone."

"I do! It's just... hard sometimes. We have violent mood swings, both of us.- One minute for him, it's all 'Sunshine, butterflies, and dancing in the rain,' the next minute, someone strangled his grandma."

"That's a crappy excuse." Chouji informed him, puttering around the shop like a housewife.

"Have you ever considered being a marriage counselour?" Sasuke finally blurted out, flushing.

"I'd have to go to more school for that- I doubt I could pull it off."

"Eh. You have the gift. Think I should go after him, or give him some time to chill?"

"Give him some time- He'll come around."

"Thanks. You're a good guy, Chouji."

"You're welcome."

-------------------------

Sasuke walked towards Naruto's house. He had nowhere else to go since all of his stuff was still at the blonde's, since he decided to leave his keys behind.

"I guess I will have to face him sooner than I thought, that is if he even came home." Sasuke sighed, not liking how this day turned out.

Looking up he saw the clear sky for the first time that day. Sasuke vaguely remembered Naruto ranting on about it, but at the time he paid it no mind.

'The dobe was right, it is a beautiful day.' He felt that overwhelming guilt wash over him once again. He found it so easy to ignore him, yet perhaps he should indulge the blonde's whimsical nature for once and listen to what he has to say.

_I always take you for granted, don't I._ A sad smile crossed his face as he continued back to the apartment.

Ah... what was he supposed to do though? Not as if Naruto would just talk to him.

Maybe he would. Naruto was unpredictable.

So Sasuke trudged back to the apartment complex, guilt in his heart. A chuckle, faintly familiar, caught his attention.

"Hey, old man. You might want to hide better. Everyone can see you," He said flatly, causing Jiraiya to turn.

"You again?" The leer was inexcusable- Sasuke wanted to slap it off his face. But that would be a girly thing to do. He was already girly enough. "Could you have been any louder?"

"What the hell!" Sasuke exclaimed, flushing, "What do you mean by that?"

The black eyes staring into his own rolled. He began, in a drawling tone, to mimic- "'Ohhhh, Naruto- Harder! Do it harder! Aaaaah! Mmm-' Honestly, you have no shame."

Sasuke avoided the older man's gaze, beet red, "Says the man who spies on his female tenants in open view of anyone passing."

"Anyways. What're you doing back here? Naruto's not in right now."

_Shiiit._ "I... um... Left some stuff here." Awkwaaaard.

"What kind of stuff?"

"Does it matter?"

"If you want me to let you into Naruto's apartment, you'd better tell me."

Sasuke sighed. "Some office supplies, my keys. My pants..."

"Oho. Well, that is perfectly acceptable."

"... fork over a key, and I promise I won't tell those women you've been watching them."

"Spoilsport," Jiraiya informed him, digging through his pockets. "Okay, okay. Here. Just... don't tell anyone I did this. It's kind of illegal."

"Yeah, I know. Well, Naruto can't care, considering he's the one who ran off before I could get my stuff. "Sasuke stopped. _And he left because I'm an asshole. Go figure._

"I thought you were bonding today?"

"We... had a disagreement." _AKA I suck and drove him off._

Jiraiya could read between the lines disturbingly well. "I see."

The keys dropped into his hand; Sasuke turned. "When you see Naruto... will you tell him I'm really sorry about what I said?"

"Sure, kid. You're okay- Just don't break Blondie's heart."

"Yeah... I'm doing my best," Sasuke muttered, "Think that's good enough?"

"Should be- You know Naruto's all for 'Do your best, damn the consequences,' after all."

"Nitwit's rubbing off on me." But it was said with affection. "Well... I hope I see you around, old man."

"I got a name," Jiraiya complained, "Why doesn't anyone use it?"

"You have white hair- That's why."

"Yeah, yeah. Have fun breaking and entering."

"You know it." And without another word, Sasuke mounted the steps and disappeared from sight.

"Damn kids. Keeping me up all night with their kinky sex games... Can't help but like them though."

Sasuke was soon standing in front of the door that read 3621. It seemed like the last time he had looked upon these numbers everything had been a little happier.

Taking a breath, he forced the key into the lock, hearing the click he opened the door to the quiet apartment.

It was strange standing here alone; everything seemed so much colder without the blonde's presence. The room not longer radiated that calm warmth that seemed to draw Sasuke in.

_Might as well hurry and get my things. I don't want to be here when he gets back._

Deciding make this a 'get in, get out' adventure, Sasuke began running through the apartment picking up his belongings.

So far he had been able to find everything except for his car keys.

_I could have sworn I left them on the table._ He cursed his luck._ Why does this always have to happen to me?_

He search began to grow frantic as the minutes clicked by. It soon seemed like he would never find them until he looked under the last cushion on the couch.

_How the hell did the get there?_ He wondered briefly.

Not bother to dwell on the matter, Sasuke went to make his exit. Luckily he had been able to gather his things before Naruto got back.

Thanking his luck he went to the door and thrust it open, only instead of hurrying out, he froze.

Before him stood the person he had been trying to avoid.

"Naruto..."

"Sasuke?"

"Um..." Sasuke looked away, thinking how awkward this was.

"... Old man?"

"Yeah. Don't tell, it's not legal." Sasuke said sarcastically, "Not that he cares, or..." He stopped, stared at Naruto. The blonde stared back.

Thus began the testosterone-fuelled staring match, which ended with them both blurting out, in unison, "I'm sorry."

Sasuke blinked, "Why are YOU sorry? I'm the ass here."

"But you're the normal one here! I overreacted, I mean, come on, we've been together how long?" Naruto made an 'I is the stupid here' face.

"Half a day, but I didn't need to be such a jerk- We've known each other for so long."

"Okay. Three, two, one..."

"You're forgiven," They chorused, chuckling slightly at each other.

"Well..." Sasuke rubbed at his neck. "I... Aniki's been... assaulting my mind. I need to get home. Ah..."

"I should meet him some time," Naruto said wistfully, "Ah, not that I'm hinting at anything."

"Heh. You don't want to meet him. Little off, that one."

"You're insulting your own brother?" Naruto raised his eyebrows.

"No, I'm telling the truth!" Sasuke was stunned at the whiney tone that emerged from his throat.

"Whatever. Well, I don't want him to kill you. Go, shoo."

Sasuke stuck his tongue out, feeling instantly better after the immature act. He then pecked Naruto on the cheek and strolled out.

"You had better not just abandon me now!" The blonde yelled after him, "Because no one else is gonna get your ass!"

"I'm not listening!" Sasuke drawled, "And you know it takes someone really special- AKA stupid- to catch my eye."

"Oh. HEY!" Sasuke shut the door with a chuckle, taking the steps down to the ground floor with ease. Jiraiya gave him a thumbs up, muttering "Keep the key, but don't tell anyone you have it."

Sasuke raised his eyes at that, but the corners of his lips quirked. "Illegal, perv boy, but thanks."

And without further ado, he practically bounced out of the apartment complex.

There was a distant yell, and he look up to see Naruto hanging out a window, waving at him. He made a ridiculous 'Mwuah!' noise, blowing a dramatic kiss at Sasuke, who couldn't help but grin.

"Knock it off, dobe!' He called cheerfully, "You're gonna fall if you aren't careful."

Naruto gave him a look, but retreated back into his apartment anyways.

Life was good. For a while, at least.

* * *

So now we have squishy. Yes. Next time... er. I swore I'd add Itach in the flesh, and he should be in the next chapter... somewhere. 

I love reviews, yes I do. Reviews inspire me to make more stupid things like the Barney song that was a surprise hit.


	7. In which kitty loves us

Whoo! Here it is, a little later than the version, because I'm having some issues with uploading. Okay, I just forgot to post it. Don't hurt me.

Starting with chapter 8, our ficcie will be beta'd by Simple-Minded Idiot.

However, PMs that are sent to me are for some reason not reaching me, and it is so with review warnings as well. So if I respond to your review really late, it's because NOBODY TOLD ME ABOUT IT. D;

(Insert snappy disclaimer here about not owning _Naruto_)

Without further ado, chapter 7.

* * *

Sasuke sat behind his desk, a mound of papers behind him. It had already been three hours since he started looking through the documents, and by the look of things he wouldn't be done anytime soon.

The reason for his slowness could be found in the fact that he could not get his mind off a certain blonde.

Every time he would start to read the fine print of one of the documents, a picture of Naruto popped up in his mind, and Sasuke would continue to fantasise about what he could be doing to his (His? What was wrong with him?) dobe.

He hadn't seen Naruto since they had made up yesterday and could barely wait to see him again. So far, everything had been going fine. Thankfully, Itachi knew nothing and for that, Sasuke was grateful- yet it was only a matter of time before the older Uchiha found out.

The office was surprisingly empty- Normally, Hinata would be running around, tripping and trying to help. She was a decent secretary, and a sweet girl, but bless her soul, she was SO clumsy.

Come to think of it, she was only his secretary because he felt bad. He couldn't imagine Hinata with a proper job, she was too shy for interviews- And they had gone to college together. He had to be nice.

And she was adorable. In that 'Cute animal' kind of way.

But that wasn't important. Itachi would be stopping by soon. Oh, the horrors- His brother was brilliantly annoying. Like Naruto, but less tolerable. Because he was always bringing his 'friends' to stop in and stare at him like some animal in a cage, and they... Sasuke clenched his hand, nearly snapping his pen. They called him adorable.

Sasuke stifled a moan of agony when the dreaded knock sounded on his office door.

"Saaaaasuke..." He heard the sing-song- KISAME WAS THERE. Oh god no.

"Oh, Sasuke's here, un?"

Oh no.

"Yes, Sasuke. In there. Why do you think I'm dragging his... guest here?" Itachi's voice was dripping with enthusiasm.

... guest. Was he expecting someone? No... Unless...

Sasuke leapt out of his seat, running to the heavy oak door and creaking it open. In his best dry, 'Why are you annoying me' tone, he asked, "Must you be so loud?"

"Oh, Sasuke!" Itachi said cheerfully, "Were you expecting someone? Because..." There was a half-conscious blob of yellow choking in Itachi's version of a half-Nelson. Sasuke winced- That had been him several times.

"Let him go, Aniki. I wasn't expecting him, but..."

"Sasuke, save meeeee..." Naruto gurgled, causing a shriek of laughter from Deidara, who was watching Sasuke's horrified expression.

"Aniki, will you _please_ let him go."

"Hmmm..." Itachi's lips quirked, "Is he important?"

"He's a client." Sasuke lied quickly, "He's a mangaka." Well, that was true at least.

Itachi promptly dropped the blonde in shock.

"OW." Naruto bounced to his feet. "Your brother's a meanie, Sasuke."

"Tell me about it. Sakura finally get you to finish up?"

"Oh yeah. And... She wanted me to tell you you're an ass. I have no idea why."

Sasuke quirked his brow. "Uh-huh. That's odd."

"Yeah. Something about Ino." Naruto scratched his head, confused. "And... cheating."

"But I hate Ino." Sasuke drawled, "And I was never with her."

Itachi was making a ridiculous face behind him, and Sasuke stuck his tongue out at him. "Knock it off, Aniki. You're a pest. Okay, well, you wanted to talk to me, so let's do that in my office. Away from prying eyes?"

Itachi rolled his own obsidian globes. "I can take a hint."

"Not if it isn't a sledgehammer."

Naruto followed the group into the large office, being sure to stay as far away from Sasuke's brother as he could. For some reason the older Uchiha couldn't take his eyes off him.

It was unnerving really, and _did he just wink at him?_ Naruto blushed and attempted to hide behind Sasuke.

This only earned a raised eyebrow from Itachi and then an evil smirk.

Sasuke was sitting in his desk with Naruto to his right and Itachi and the others in front of him.

"So Itachi, what did you come here to talk about?"

Itachi, who wasn't listening, or just rather ignoring his brother, turned his attention to the blond.

"So you are a mangaka? That's interesting, I don't ever remember Sasuke publishing something such as manga. I believe you called them... what was it again? Oh yes, I remember, a 'piece of trash that only an idiot would read let alone write'."

Sasuke set his glare on his brother. "Your point is?"

Itachi's grin grew, and Naruto broke in. "We- there are... some special circumstances... but yes I am a mangaka... most of my books deal with romance, angst... they're yaoi..." He finished looking up to meet Itachi's gaze.

"Well… that's interesting. I look forward to seeing your work..." Itachi paused, "I am afraid I never got your name."

"Oh, please call me Naruto, Uzumaki Naruto."

"Pleased to meet you Naruto-kun, and I look forward to seeing your work."

_Oh my god, my brother is flirting with my boyfriend..._ Naruto was clearly uncomfortable, squirming in his seat as Itachi pumped him with questions.

"Uh... well yeah, I have an editor. She's really... strict, and stuff, so..."

Sasuke head was killing him- Deidara was making eyes at Naruto. UGH. That was so not right.

_Okay- I can either ignore this and suffer, or I can make a scene and tell everyone I'm gay. Eenie meenie minie mo... Grab my boyfriend by the- NO._

Sasuke's head hit the desk with a thump. "Itachi, will you stop tormenting him?"

"Why? I'm not tormenting him, I'm asking questions. How long have you known Sasuke?"

"We uh... went to college together," Naruto muttered. "Okay, this is really awkward."

"I told you." Sasuke informed him, "I TOLD you that you didn't want to meet Itachi. But you just wouldn't listen, would you, dobe?"

"Oho. Pet names." Kisame chuckled. "Me thinks the boys are more than friends... hmm?"

Sasuke turned pale and Naruto turned a bright red. If Itachi had been anyone else, he might have though that the two men were embarrassed at being called a couple, but Sasuke's silence pointed towards another option.

If Sasuke had really been embarrassed he would have started throwing a fit and cursing at anyone and everyone, yet the Sasuke only sat there as if he didn't not know what to do.

"Kisame, I think you might have something there." Itachi eyed his brother, who had come to his senses and started to glare at Itachi.

"I do believe that Kisame has nothing... I wish you all would stop making false accusations." Sasuke finally spoke up.

"Oh but we aren't making false accusations, are we Naruto?" He eyed Naruto, an evil plan forming in his mind.

"Uh..." Naruto sensed that Sasuke didn't want his brother knowing they were together, and zipped his mouth. "Erm. There's really- We're friends." Not a lie- A half-truth. They were friends. The fact that they were also lovers wasn't important.

"Close. Friends. Itachi, how about you and Kisame do whatever you two do when you're alone, okay?" Sasuke said through gritted teeth.

"Oh yes. Sasuke is definitely hiding something, un." Deidara murmured, causing Naruto to flush very, very red.

"Uh. Can we change the subject?" He squeaked, scratching the back of his neck in embarrassment.

"Oh, certainly," Itachi smirked, "How long have you been sleeping with my brother?"

Naruto fell off his chair-Sasuke squeaked, almost unnoticeably.

Almost.

"We've won! WE HAVE HIT GOLD, Itachi!" Kisame held a hand out for Itachi to high-five.

The blonde was bright red and stammering as he picked himself up off the floor.

"But- Wait- I- Can explain- Not what you think-"

Sasuke put his head in his hands, "Give it up, Naruto. Yes, Aniki," This was addressed to Itachi, "We had sex. Once. Let it die, please."

"So that's where you were yesterday? Canoodling?" Kisame chuckled, holding a hand up to his pale mouth.

"For shame, un." Deidara mock-scolded.

"We are grown men! We can have sex with whoever we choose to!" Sasuke half-yelled, standing up quickly.

"I think we've annoyed him." Itachi said calmly. "Kisame, Deidara. I believe it is the correct time to take our leave."

Naruto slumped down in his seat as the three older men left the room. "They're friggin' evil."

"I. Told. You. I told you! You don't want to know my brother. Or his friends. They're not normal!" Sasuke thumped back down into his chair, sighing.

"I get it now, jeez. Well, what I came by to tell you was that... um. Besides the Ino thing? It's kind of..."

"Spit it out. Is it a great tragedy?"

"You remember Iruka-sensei, obviously. He's... been in an accident."

Sasuke's blood ran cold- Iruka-sensei had been one of the kindest, most understanding people he'd known. He sat forward, "Serious?"

"No, he's gonna pull through. But everyone's really worried about him. He's broken his arm, and three ribs are cracked. Sakura told me that he's got internal bleeding- but not serious. She does volunteer hours at the hospital, gives blood, that kind of stuff." Naruto rested his forehead in one hand.

"Oh- Is anyone else hurt?"

"Mizuki-sensei was in the car with him- So was Kurenai-sensei. Iruka-sensei says the accident was Mizuki's fault. He was driving. They don't think he's gonna make it."

"Isn't Kurenai pregnant?!" Sasuke was stunned- Children were everything to Kurenai. She had a two-year-old at home!

"Kurenai's okay. The baby's fine too."

"Thank god. Have you been to visit?"

"Not yet- I wanted to see if you had heard about it first."

"No, I haven't heard anything, but then again, I _have_ been swamped with work." He said, pointing to the stack of papers in front of him.

"Well... How about you finish up here and I'll wait, then we can go to the hospital together?" Naruto asked, looking at the Uchiha with pleading eyes.

Not being able to say no to a face like that, Sasuke could only nod and give in.

"Just give me another hour and then I will be able to go." Naruto smiled and jumped up with an enthusiastic "Yippie!"

Sasuke couldn't help but smile, Naruto was just so innocent and cute at times, but Sasuke knew the blonde was anything _but_ innocent. Pictures of the other night passed through his mind causing him to blush and turn back to his work.

"Why don't you wait outside, Naruto?" The blonde nodded, not wanting to keep Sasuke from his work.

Naruto gave the brunette on last smile before turning around and heading out the door, and shutting it behind him.

_Might as well see what I can do while I wait._ Naruto turned around in the hall, but froze at what met his gaze.

_Holy-_ He thought, blinking at the yellow eyes that stared straight at him.

The black and tawny cat stretched and meowed, jumping off the table in the hall to inspect him. Naruto held very still as he was sniffed, taking it as a good sign when the cat at his feet bumped against him, mewing.

He bent down to pet the furry creature, deciding it meant him no harm. There was a cough from behind him- Naruto turned quickly to meet black eyes.

"Uh. This is your cat?" He asked Itachi uncertainly, looking between the man and the cat, which was meowing insistently at him.

"He's the office stray- Appears and disappears sporadically. We don't really know what to think of him- Sasuke's taken a liking to him, despite calling him 'That annoying fuzzball'." The older Uchiha informed him, gathering the ball of fluff in his arms. "Oi, Sasuke. Kakeru's made his next appearance."

"Really?" The door creaked back open- Black eyes glistened as they peered out, "The fuzzball lives?"

Itachi rolled his eyes. "If he didn't, why would I be dropping him off to eat your work?"

Kakeru wiggled in Itachi's grasp, meowing at Sasuke. Naruto mock-gasped.

"A lover, Sasuke? He's just as annoying as I am!"

"You saying I'm sleeping with a cat?" Sasuke drawled, "That's not _my_ problem."

"Yeah, it's Kiba's." Naruto paused. "But he has a dog."

"Okay, okay. This is weirding me out." Itachi told them, "Just take your feline and keep him out of my stuff."

"Oh yes, we don't want a repeat of the _last_ incident." Sasuke chuckled, allowing the cat to puddle in his arms like liquid fuzz. Naruto watched carefully, but the only hint of embarrassment from the older man was a slight stiffening and a subtle reddening of the ears.

"Oooh. What happened last time?" Naruto pried, giggling.

"Sasuke..." Itachi warned, looking severe. Sasuke scratched the purring cat under the chin, chuckling.

"What, I'm not allowed to mention the incident? You have to admit, it _was _funny to see the cat running around with your lube."

"Sasuke!" Itachi yelled, scandalized. "You swore you'd never mention that again!"  
The reaction caused both younger men to explode into laughter.

"But. It. Was... HYSTERICAL." Sasuke wheezed, leaning against the doorframe. Kakeru licked his paw, proud of himself. He mewed, looking for attention.

Naruto stroked to cat lovingly, "You are a brilliant kitty. Next time you do that, make sure I'm here."

"Yeah, yeah..." Itachi grumbled, stalking off in a dry, 'I am pissed' manner.

"We love you, Aniki!" Sasuke teased, hoisting Kakeru up in his arms and retreating back into his office. Naruto wandered in after him. "Now. You- Stop licking me- Are absolutely not eating any of this work. You can attack Itachi and chew on him, you can steal his condoms, but you cannot eat this work."

"I love this cat."

"So do I. Damn fuzzball's so useful. Watch this-" Sasuke pulled a piece of cord out from one of his desk drawers, looping a piece of paper on it. He scrawled a message- 'Watch your ass, kitty loves you' on it, and told the cat, tying the cord in a loose knot around his fuzzy neck, "Bring this to Itachi."

Kakeru looked up at him, as if asking 'What am I getting outta this?' and Sasuke jingled a cat toy. There was a loud meow, and Kakeru trotted purposefully out of the room.

Mere seconds later, there was a yelp from elsewhere in the house, and Itachi was heard to be yelling, "I HATE YOU SASUKE!"

"I really love that cat." Sasuke said wistfully.

"More than me?" Naruto pouted, giving Sasuke his best 'I'm adorable, love me' face.

"Nah," Naruto brightened, "Loads more."

"Bastard!"

"Moron!"

* * *

Okay, who loves kitty?

WE DO.

Who wants to shoot me for putting a cat in this?

Hopefully no one! So, that was chapter eight. Ruru's been in a car accident, because Akiru and I decided we needed some drama. And opportunities for closeness betweren our boys.


	8. In which Sasuke recalls

Here we are, chapter 8, all shiney and new with... stuff. Kakeru is my favorite kitty.

Akiru says hi from happy land.

DISCLAIMER: We all know what would happen if Naruto was mine. Good thing it isn't.

* * *

After the small kitty episode, Sasuke was able to get his work done quickly, and was now walking towards the main door of his office building with Naruto. 

"So what hospital was he admitted into?" Sasuke asked, wanting to know where exactly they were headed.

"That new– the building on 6th street... you know, where that old rundown factory used to be." Naruto replied.

"Oh yeah... I miss that place. I can't count how many times we used to go over there to drink." Sasuke said fondly.

"Yeah, but I think the greatest time we had there was when we had the cops called on us and we had to hide in that itty broken furnace."

"Good thing it didn't work anymore or we could have been cooked whole." Sasuke laughed. He enjoyed having these trips down memory lane with Naruto.

"I can just imagine it.'Naruto, my pants are on fire!' 'Shut up, the cops'll hear us!' I wonder who it was that snitched on us." Naruto stopped, blinking soon afterwards.

"I bet it was Shino. You know how weird he was. Is." Sasuke hit the button on his keys. His car chirped, unlocked.

"... you know you want me to drive."

Sasuke gave Naruto a look. "No. I don't. Last time, I swear to god, you hit a fire hydrant."

"Are there scratches on your car? NO. Therefore, I didn't hit anything solid. I hope Akamaru wasn't out that night though."

"Would've been bloodstains on the car," Sasuke informed him, sliding onto the leather seats. "Get in. I'm driving."

"Naw..." Naruto groaned. He got in anyway, purposefully rubbing his hand on the seat to make the leather squeak.

After about five minutes of a verbally silent drive, Sasuke decided he'd had enough.

"Stop squeaking," he said.

"Why?" Naruto asked.

"You're rubbing leather."

"So?"

"Think dirty."

"Oh. OH." Naruto rubbed the leather harder emitting a throaty moan. "S-Sasuke... oh, yeah..."

Sasuke flushed crimson, trying to ignore the sex sounds he had unintentionally started. "Knock it off."

"But it's so good..." Naruto slid a hand up his orange t-shirt, rubbing his own abs. _They were nice abs,_ Sasuke thought distractedly, _firm, but slightly rounded, like– D'oh_

"I'm going to crash this car if you keep doing that," he said.

Naruto squeaked. "I'll be good."

"Good dog."

"HEY." Naruto pouted. He then spluttered, "Turn left please. Quickly."

"Why?" Sasuke asked suspiciously.

"Just do it!" Naruto reached towards the wheel. Sasuke spun it to the left before Naruto could knock them onto the sidewalk.

"Speak. What the hell was that?"

Naruto was beet red. "I saw Sai. He kind of... wants me. Badly."

"..." Sasuke coughed. He coughed again. The coughing fit exploded into a laughing fit. Naruto stuck out his tongue. "Sai – Hahaha – wants you."

"Yes. Is that so hard to believe?" Naruto pulled his shirt up and prodded one very pink nipple. "I am a sexy beast."

Sasuke bit his lip to keep from laughing at that. He made an illegal U-turn, going back to the correct road. There was no one else on that road anyway.

Parallel parking was, perhaps, Sasuke's favorite thing to do – don't ask why; he couldn't explain it anyway. They were at a hospital parking lot and he just desperately wanted to parallel park.

"Okay, Naruto. Back seat," Sasuke said.

The blonde slithered over the seat and into the back. "Why'd you want me back here, Sasuke? Want a quickie in the car?"

"No," Sasuke said cheerfully. He then hit a button on the car door. A Plexiglas screen quickly separated the two. "Might be nice though."

"HEY!" Came Naruto's muffled cry. He banged on the barrier.

Sasuke contentedly got out of his car.

The back seat was childproof and had no locks. He locked the car with a delighted grin. Naruto glared at him.

Sasuke pulled something out of his trunk, keeping it hidden from the blonde's view. He began to write on a piece of paper: 'Property of Uchiha Sasuke. Do not open until X-mas,' and taped it to the back of his sleek black vehicle.

Naruto yelled at him through the windows.

Sasuke turned to walk away.

Naruto made a pathetic whining noise.

Sasuke took a few steps in the opposite direction.

Naruto yelled at him that this wasn't legal.

Sasuke frowned and hit the unlock button on his keys.

A few seconds later, Sasuke was knocked down onto the pavement, out of breath for more than one reason. Naruto's revenge had come in a very violent, passionate kiss. His lips were pressed hard against Sasuke's, tongues already battling for dominance.

Sasuke sat up shakily once Naruto had let go of him, panting for breath. He made a face.

"You messed up my hair," he said.

"Tch," Naruto mocked, eyes closed, "Princess."

"Let's just head in."

Naruto pouted, "You're no fun, Teme."

"Who ever said I had to be fun?"

"Bastard."

Sasuke smiled, "But you love me for it."

"That's what you think." Naruto mumbled half-heartedly, not meaning what he had said.

"Yeah, yeah, come on."

Naruto hoisted himself up and followed Sasuke to the large, brick building. Inside, everything was clean and sterile-looking, and gave off a smell that reminded the blonde of disinfectant.

"I hate hospitals." Naruto said to himself as he eyed some doctors and nurses hurrying to see their patients.

"Same here, but what can you do?" The brunette said while he walked up to the receptionist.

The young woman smiled and blushed when Sasuke approached her, the usual reaction the Uchiha got from the female population.

Naruto glared at the girl but she seemed to ignore him.

"How may I help you?" She asked in a voice that was so falsely sweet that it made both the boys queasy.

"We're visiting someone...?" Sasuke said lightly, ignoring the blush that rose to the girl's face as he addressed her.

Naruto turned his attention to the room, staring at the dirtiest parts of it. He stared at the corners, walking over to inspect them. An older couple glared at him.

"Hey, Sasu-chan. Check out the dirt of this floor. It's fucking everywhere."

Sasuke's head spun to face Naruto. He was halfway done signing his name in the hospital's guest book. He laughed at the blonde's expression. "Not as bad as your mouth, though."

"Oh, and yours is sparkly and minty. Your mouth can get just as bad," Naruto drawled, gesturing provocatively with his hips. "About two nights ago..."

Sasuke's blush mirrored the receptionist's. She stuttered at him – her stuttering was worse than Hinata's – if Naruto could please not do that in the hospital lobby.

At least, that's what Sasuke thought she said.

"Stop it, dobe!" Sasuke hissed, scarlet creeping to his ears as Naruto laughed.

"You w-were here to visit..." the receptionist stuttered.

"Umino Iruka," Sasuke muttered. "Could you please just tell us the room number?"

She scanned a long list of names and room numbers. "Umino... room 127."

"Thank you." Sasuke said, regaining his cool. "And you." He turned to Naruto. "No discussion of our sex lives in hospital lobbies."

"Eh. Not like anyone in here doesn't already know what sex is like. Hot, sweaty, and–" Naruto started to say.

Sasuke's hand clamped over the blonde's mouth, blush returning.

"I'm so sorry." He said sincerely – the young woman was dangerously close to resembling a tomato. "Could you just point us in the right direction? I swear, we'll be out of your hair."

Naruto made a gurgling noise, pretending to choke. Sasuke made a disgusted face as the blonde licked his hand in an attempt to make him let go. They followed the flushing receptionist's directions, arriving at the correct room with little trouble.

Sasuke finally let go of the blonde. He wiped his hand on his pants, making a face.

"Had to make a scene, didn't you?" he asked.

"Yeah, that's about right." Naruto grinned as he pushed the door open. It's best if you removed the "with only a slight creak" because it doesn't make sense.

Their former teacher was reading. What, Sasuke wasn't sure, but it looked like a get-well card.

It didn't make much sense that the older man was blushing as he read it.

"Iruka-sensei?" Naruto grimaced. "Man. You look like... shit. No offense."

Iruka gave him a look. One Sasuke had never received, but had seen directed at Naruto all the time.

"So, why am I being visited by my best and worst students?" Iruka taunted back, raising his eyebrows. "Sasuke? Why are you blushing?"

Sasuke looked away quickly. "Nothing."

He had seen the inside of the card. It was from Kakashi. Figures.

But, oh my god, it was suggestive.

"Life's thrown a real curveball at you, huh, sensei?" Naruto said uncomfortably, unsure what to say.

"Mizuki's an asshole." Iruka said.

Sasuke internally squealed. Iruka, cursing? Oh my god. What was happening to the world?

Naruto couldn't help snicker at his sensei's choice of words.

"What?" Iruka questioned.

"Nothing, I just liked your choice of words." Naruto replied, a smile creeping across his face. "But anyways, how long are they going to hold you up here?" "You make it sound like they're holding him hostage." Sasuke said looking at the blonde.

"Well they are; he could get the same kind of rest at home."

Sasuke just shook his head. Apparently, the dobe didn't fully understand the concept of Iruka needing medical care.

"Well I think they will let me out in a week. They still need to do surgery on my arm in order to realign the bone and get rid of the bone fragments." Iruka informed the two young men.

"Sounds like it will hurt." Sasuke commented. Surgery was not one of his favorite things to participate in. The last time he went under the knife was when he had his appendix removed. Yup, not a fond memory.

"Yeah, I guess it will... they are putting screws in too."

"You mean like in your arm?" Naruto sounded amazed at the idea.

"Yeah, but in the bone to hold it together." Their sensei stated.

"Oi, dobe. You act as if you've never broken a bone." Sasuke thunked the blonde on the head.

"OW. I haven't!" Naruto exclaimed.

An awkward silence descended on the room.

"... what?" Iruka's tone was pure disbelief – Sasuke couldn't blame him.

The idiot who hung off the college roof when he was drunk and 'fell' had never broken a bone?

Okay, so Sasuke had pushed Naruto being not so sober himself. In his defense, the blonde would've fallen off himself eventually. And the roof wasn't that high anyway. He was caught on the way down by a tree, and landed in a bush, then was carted off to the hospital, returning relatively unscathed.

And no one knew to this day that it had been Sasuke's fault despite the blonde's hung-over screeches of 'TEME PUSHED ME! SOMEBODY SMACK THAT BITCH UP!'

Thank god, everyone assumed that it was just Naruto trying to blame Sasuke for his own stupidity.

Naruto was staring at him.

"What?" he asked.

"You just giggled..." Iruka helpfully supplied.

"You've honestly never broken a bone?" Sasuke asked finally, trying to use his next statement as his defense for... giggling. "Oh, damn. I thought you were kidding."

Naruto scowled at him. "Is that so hard to believe?"

"Considering how you acted in college?"

"... oh."

Sasuke was right – he was a disaster waiting to happen back then.

"That's true but I had you guys there." he continued.

"Ain't that the truth? I can't count how many times I alone had to save you from nearly getting killed. In fact, I think that's how I got most of my injuries." Sasuke sent a stern look at his friend. "You owe me for all those times." His face immediately turned into a mischievous grin.

"I am thankful for all that, but I have repaid you in more ways than one..."

"Oh really? Like how?"

Iruka sat on his bed, becoming irritated with his guests. They were always the same, never able to get along for longer than a few minutes.

"Like–"

Sasuke coughed. "Never mind. Um. So how are you doing, Iruka-sensei?"

"As soon as they let me out of this hospital room, I'm finding Mizuki and killing him myself." Iruka said.

"Okay..." Sasuke's eyes were wide – Naruto snickered behind his hand. "Shut it dobe, or I'll give you your first broken bone."

"Not if I snap your arms first!" Naruto crowed.

There was a brief slap-fight that was laden with yelps and shouts.

"Get. Off! I can't afford to break this arm again!" Sasuke screeched, trying to keep Naruto from sinking his teeth into the Uchiha's forearm.

"Oh. You broke it before?" Naruto blinked.

Sasuke grimaced. "Yeah. Freak office accident."

Iruka's eyes gleamed. "I always knew offices were secretly deadly. That's why I took a job where they admit you'll get hurt."

"Dude. Tell us what happened." Naruto said.

"Okay, okay. This is kinda a long story, but... You know how after college, I made a break for the New York office to get away from you people? I ended up suffering something even worse. Hence, I'm back. Well, I had three office companions – one who complained worse than you, Naruto, one who wanted to be in my pants... like you, Naruto,"

Iruka chuckled.

"Shut up, with all due respect, Iruka-sensei. And the last one was just crazy. When he wasn't a loony, he was brilliant. But most of the time he was crazier than a chipmunk on speed.

"Well, there was an incident.

"Suigetsu, our complainer, was having his daily fit – he got dehydrated very easily, and when he got dehydrated, he became... obnoxious. So he's bitching at Karin, who wants me somewhat desperately, to go get him a bottle of water. And she's bitching right back, so it's spawned this awful... thing. Anyway... Eventually, Sui gives up and asks me to go get him the damn water, but I was friggin' working at the time, so of course I couldn't. Suigetsu," Sasuke drawled, "Is an idiot. You know the type.

"He then turns to Juugo, who's like a serial killer when he's mad. And he goes, 'Get me a bottle of water...?' It went bad real fast. Within five minutes, we were all hiding behind a fucking desk while Juugo shot staples at us. He eventually ran out of staples, and it got really quiet. So Suigetsu looks up over the desk to see if he's calmed down. Like a douche bag.

"Juugo had not calmed down. Three seconds later, Suigetsu was on the floor – Juugo fucking stabbed him with a paperclip. Now, it was a paperclip, so it didn't hurt much – it bent. But holy fuck. Next thing I know, the loony's jumped over the desk, and dropped a chair on Karin, who's screaming bloody murder and calling for security. They have these special tranquilizers for Juugo, see. And BAM, door flies open, there's the boss – and then Juugo knocks the desk over on my arm.

"Okay, so that really hurt, but it wasn't enough to break my arm. What happened next was... well, there was a lot of stuff in that desk, and it was mostly really heavy stuff. Juugo finally starts to calm down. Then SUIGETSU breaks my fucking arm by knocking the big lug onto the

turned over desk. Which is still on my arm because I didn't have enough time to get it out."

"... whoa. I gotta get me some of that office action." Naruto said, eyes wide. "I wish my job was that exciting!"

"No, you don't. That was when I transferred. I couldn't take it anymore. My office was full of crazies, and my boss wanted me as much as crazy Karin did."

"Yeah, well, at least you have stories like that to tell... I just sit around at home drawing and getting writer's cramps." Naruto grumbled.

Sasuke just shook his head, not wanting to comment. Sometimes, it was better to just humor the blonde.

Shaking his head, he looked at their sensei who seemed to be getting tired. Noticing Iruka's current state, he looked at Naruto who surprisingly noticed it as well.

"Well, I think we should go before we wear out our welcome." Sasuke said, turning to Naruto once again.

"Yeah, I guess we will leave ya to get some more rest Iruka-sensei." Naruto said.

"Bye, you guys, it was nice to see you again." Iruka bade them goodbye as they strode out of the small room and back into the long halls of the hospital.

The receptionist stuttered a good bye as they left, causing Naruto to grin cheekily and wave. Sasuke groaned and grabbed Naruto's arm, dragging him out the door.

"Okay. So Iruka-sensei's fine. Wanna... go do something?" Sasuke asked, scratching the back of his neck absentmindedly. "We've got some time, right?"

"Sure. We could..." Naruto wiggled his hips.

"No."

"But–"

"NO." Sasuke turned. "We could go get something to eat."

"Let's get ice cream." Naruto suggested, eyes gleaming. Was he ever full?

"No. Chouji must be sick of us."

"We could go back to my place and snuggle."

Sasuke gave him a look. Naruto whimpered quietly.

Ten minutes later, they were curled up together in a ball of snuggle on Naruto's couch.

Sasuke found out that it wasn't such a horrible fate.

* * *

BALL OF SNUGGLE FTW. 

Uh. So, I hope you liked it, and just to remind you guys, Akiru has a account, which is (OHGASP) Akiru chan.

Go read her shit. It's t3h awesome. And has ItaSaku. Nobody scream. NOBODY. If you do, I will... stop posting. BELIEVE MY THREATS.

And reviews are niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice. Especially for me. They inspire me.


	9. In which there is tragedy

Okay! YOU ARE ALL GOING TO HATE US FOR THIS CHAPTER. Just a warning. I have no other comment.

Written by Kalio & Akiru chan, beta'd by Simple-Minded Idiot. Praise her, she's god.

Witty disclaimer would be nice, but none of the people mentioned own Naruto. But I DO have a jar of dirt.

* * *

Sasuke woke, his nose taking in the scent of bacon. _Where am I?_ He thought as he tried to regain his bearings. 

He was currently positioned on a couch in a living room that seemed familiar, but not his own.

"Oi, teme, you're finally up?" A voice called from behind him. The raven-haired man looked up to see his blond boyfriend standing in the kitchen entranceway, wearing an apron emblazoned with the words 'Kiss My Ass'.

It took Sasuke a moment to realize that _that_ was indeed all the blonde was wearing. He instantly had to hold down a blush and an oncoming nosebleed.

"Na... Naruto what are you doing?" he asked.

The blond smiled, "Cooking breakfast." He soon turned around and sauntered back into the kitchen.

To Sasuke's extreme disappointment, Naruto had been wearing boxers that were previously hidden. _But we can change that_, a voice in the back of Sasuke's mind spoke, causing him to smirk.

"You're eyeing me funny, teme. It's kind of creepy." Naruto said haughtily. "No hanky panky." Sasuke bit his lip to keep himself from laughing – Naruto read him too well. "That's not what I was thinking. Lemme see what inane thing is on your boxers this time."

'OMG' read the boxers – Naruto pranced happily from the stove top to the table, laying out plates laden with bacon and eggs. "Okay. Classic housewife question despite me not being a housewife. Sunny-side up?" he asked.

"Whatever floats your boat, which I am suspecting is a leaky dinghy." Sasuke slurred as he stretched. He scratched the back of his neck. "Anyone call for me?"

"Oh, yes. Hinata called. She wanted me, 'W-whenever it's cu-convenient', to tell you that a client's bitching at you to get his book out." "Please say it wasn't Tohma."

"Er... hold on, I wrote it down, 'Kurishima Taki'."

Sasuke's forehead creased in thought. "Oh. Shit. That's the guy who's publishing the 'Onegai-Arigato' romance novels with us."

"You publish those cheesy things?" Naruto blinked. "They're beyond lame."

"Yeah, well," Sasuke sighed, "women like them. I don't know why – there's no pain in them."

Naruto let out a chuckle, which exploded into full-blown laughter. "Pain, huh? I didn't know you were into the S & M kinda stuff."

Sasuke turned red. "That's not what I meant!" He said quickly. "What I mean is that all the pain that's in there is cheap emotional crap, or guys fighting over girls in those unrealistic fistfights!"

"Yeah, I guess. But y'know, I'd pegged you for the rough type. Do not argue, I have proof. Even if it's just my own experiences."

Sasuke threw a piece of bacon at the blonde, satisfied when it connected with Naruto's face and left a greasy stain.

Naruto wiped it off with his apron, licked butter off one finger, and proceeded to make Sasuke turn very, very red. "Let's see... The Manual to Dating an Uchiha. I'm going to write it. You're going to publish it, and Sakura-chan remains editor of the century. Here's how the sex chapter's going to go – 'When engaging in coitus with a member of the Uchiha family, do _not_ be afraid of being rough with them. Holding back will only serve to disappoint your partner. They enjoy fast, violent sex and it is unsurprising to learn that many Uchiha males are not only homosexual, but also masochistic.

"Uchihas are prone to B-Movie yelps, cries, gasps, and moans; don't be worried if your Uchiha lover yells at you to either 'Knock it off!' or 'Faster! Harder!' mid-coitus – it is only a sign of his or her affection and enthusiasm towards current activities. Uchihas are surprisingly mellow after orgasm, and will give you warning when approaching climax through a series of gasped words, groans, and/or a shriek of your or another person's name–'"

Sasuke hit Naruto with another piece of bacon.

All in all, both thought it was a job well done.

"So, dear, what are the plans for today?" Naruto asked in a sugary sweet voice.

"You can drop the housewife act." Sasuke looked at the man in front of him with a questioning gaze. "Unless you like playing the role of my wife. Being a woman suits you." He said with a smirk.

"Too bad you already play the role of the woman. We already know who wears the pants in this relationship." The blonde countered, earning a growl from his partner. "Oh, I'm sorry, did I say something wrong?" He laughed.

"Fuck you!"

"Oh, no, no. Fuck _You_!" Naruto's grin became wider.

"Is that an offer?" The Uchiha asked.

"Could be... but I am afraid that it will have to wait. You've got a job to do." Naruto pointed at the clock.

"Shit, we're going to be late."

"_We_'re? I don't have to be anywhere."

"Oh, yes you do. You're coming with me."

"But Sasuke!" Naruto whined.

"No 'but Sasuke'!"

"Ass-face! Just because you have a job to do doesn't mean–"

They were interrupted as Sasuke's phone rang. It was a shrill, piercing sound unlike his other ringtones. Naruto recalled that Sasuke had informed him that if he heard that sound coming from the phone, he should get Sasuke immediately. If Sasuke was sleeping, Naruto should "wake him up and give him the damn phone". This was his emergency ringtone – any number that made that sound was to be used only if something terrible had happened.

Sasuke's face was white. He answered the phone shakily. "H-hello? Yes, it's me."

The brunette froze, listening. "M-mom... This is..."

Naruto kept himself from hugging the other man as tears rolled down Sasuke's pale cheeks.

"I- Mother- How... how did it happen?" he asked.

The blonde held his breath.

"I'll be there. I-I know where to go." Sasuke wiped his face and closed his phone. He let out a sob and buried his face in his hands. His entire body was shaking.

"Sasuke..." Naruto began quietly, "do you want to tell me what happened?"

The brunette looked up at him with lost eyes. He threw himself at the blonde in a gesture of blind sorrow.

"Oh, Sasuke..."

He had never seen Sasuke this broken, this lost. He was shaking, sobbing. Tears soaked through Naruto's apron. He rested a hand on Sasuke's head as he rubbed the brunette's back with his other hand.

A second later, Sasuke tore himself away from Naruto, then threw himself on the couch. He screamed. An eternity of loss was conveyed through that sound. He raged and shrieked and sobbed. He threw a plate full of food at the wall, all the while sobbing, "He's gone, he's gone."

The crash and clatter was ungodly loud. The eggs that had been on the plate slid down the wall.

Someone knocked on the door.

Naruto slowly made his way to answer it.

When he finally opened the door, Sasuke was curled in a ball of pain, sobbing in a corner of the living room.

One of his neighbors was at the door. Gaara, which was the name of the aforementioned neighbor, looked at him strangely. "Who's crying? I heard a crash..."

Sasuke screamed again, "He's never coming back! It's ALL MY FAULT!"

"It's Sasuke." Naruto said quietly. "I think his brother just died."

-----------------------------------------------

When Sasuke had finally quelled his hysterics, Naruto ushered him out the door, wrapping a quilt around his broken form.

The brunette was still shaking and tears still flowed down his face. Gaara trailed after them uselessly, freaked out and wanting to help. Tear stains marred both his shirt and Naruto's apron – Sasuke had flung himself at Gaara as well, weeping all over the redhead.

Naruto was afraid of what was going to happen next.

Jiraiya was obviously the next target.

Sasuke had officially lost it to grief. He was crying on the _OLD MAN_. And Naruto couldn't even be amused.

"Sasuke... We're going to take you home, okay?" he said.

Sasuke, hyperventilating, gasped frantically, allowing Naruto to hold him close and lead him out of the building.

The drive to Sasuke's house was not much better. Sasuke had finally stopped crying, but that was what worried Naruto.

Before him now sat a man he did not even recognize. Sasuke, if that person even was Sasuke, looked dead to the blonde, sitting there while looking off into nothingness, a look of despair on his face. They were silent and still on the whole drive. They didn't even make the slightest movement.

As Naruto drove, he let his mind wander on what could have happened to cause this tragic event. Hell, Naruto wasn't even sure if it was indeed Sasuke's brother that had died, but he did not know any other male that Sasuke was this close to.

His father had died a year before Naruto had met him and, at that time, his only family were his mother and brother.

Naruto turned into the long driveway of Sasuke's home.

"We're here." The blonde said meekly, earning no reply from the Uchiha.

Getting out of the car, Naruto walked around and helped Sasuke out. The raven-haired man continued to stay in this lost state as if he had lost his soul and was merely a doll.

"Sasuke..."

There was no response. It was as if Sasuke had literally died.

"Was it Itachi?"

Sasuke looked at Naruto, his face void of all emotion. "Please go away."

His voice was cracked and hollow, and he sounded like someone else.

Naruto's heart cracked, and shattered into fragments that shredded his insides. "I love you," he whispered, "so I'll leave."

He could not bear to look at the other man as he walked away. Tears rose, unbidden, to burn his eyes. He had said it. He had admitted his feelings. And Sasuke had said nothing.

He wept as he left, hating himself and hating Sasuke, and wondering if the problem was the Sasuke didn't feel... or that he felt too much.

"I love you, Sasuke," he whispered again, "and I'm so, so sorry."

Sakura called him from the hospital. She confirmed it for him. Itachi had died – they were still investigating the cause of the killer flames. Witnesses had seen him run into the building despite the fire. They had tried to stop him, but he said he was trying to save someone. Seconds later, a cat had leapt from a first-story window, landing in a bush and escaping. Itachi had been trapped inside.

Naruto knew exactly what had happened as soon as the cat was mentioned.

The cat that Itachi had hated. He had known how much Sasuke loved that cat, and had tried to save it. Naruto let out a sob, ending the call.

No wonder Sasuke thought it was his fault. It was.

And what hurt Naruto the most was that he couldn't lie to the brunette, couldn't tell him that he wasn't to blame. Even if Sasuke were to believe that, Naruto himself would not.

* * *

You were sooooo warned. Don't say it. We are so gonna get flamed for this. But we don't care. RIP, Itachi-nii. 

Unlike ice cream, reviews are fat-free! Keep me slim, and review!


	10. In which we finally update

OKAY. I'll admit. This chapter's been done for almost three weeks. But Kalio-chan went away on vacation, so Akiru was left alone, and Kalio is our link to the beta reader. Who, despite being slow, is still very much loved and appreciated. ((For the fans that read _Always_- I'll do something with that soon, I swear.))

Without further ado, Smudging Ink's chapter 10, as written by Kalio and Akiru chan and beta'd by Simple-Minded Idiot.

* * *

The air was cold and crisp. The light drizzle made the day dreary and lifeless.

Naruto stood alone, clad in a black suit and an umbrella over his head. His eyes were downcast and no longer held the same warmth that they once had. They were now as cold as he himself felt.

The past few days had been hell. No one said losing a loved one was easy, but he never thought it would be this hard. He could not even begin to fathom what Sasuke must be going through.

Naruto was not close to Itachi – hell, he had only seen the guy _once_ – but it hurt him dearly to see the effect it had on his one and only love. He was slowly losing Sasuke, not to death but to something much worse. Sorrow.

Since the incident two days ago, Naruto had not heard a sound from Sasuke; He had tried calling multiple times, wanting nothing more than to comfort the Uchiha. Yet he was always met with the solemn, infuriating answering machine.

It wasn't till this morning when Sasuke, with a voice that was dead and quiet, had called him that Naruto had heard of the funeral. It was a short conversation where the brunette gave the information on the funeral that would take place later that day.

Now, here Naruto stood, watching the beautifully polished cedar coffin being lowered into the moist earth.

Sasuke stood next to him, not making a single sound. It was as if the man was in another world, completely oblivious to his surroundings. Sadly, he had been like this since Naruto had picked him up hours before.

It scared Naruto to think that this person before him was the strong and powerful man he had fallen in love with. _Don't fall into despair, don't let yourself wander alone. You have me, you are never alone_, Naruto thought, his eyes tracing the petals on the lily he held in his hands.

He could see Sasuke's mother, Mikoto, after searching her out in the crowd. She was dressed in black, of course. Unlike Sasuke, who stood numb, tears dripped slowly down her face at the loss of her first son.

Sasuke had read the obituary, mere minutes ago. He had looked cool, collected. Completely calm.

Naruto knew that Sasuke had been screaming on the inside. Somewhere, deep within the Uchiha, a young boy wept for his beloved older brother.

There were others at the funeral. Friends, perhaps family. Kisame and Deidara stood solemnly, full of sorrow at the loss of their mutual friend and lover.

A man with silver hair was kneeling, praying perhaps. Another, one who wore a black head-covering, stood silently with his eyes closed. There was also a man with auburn hear that was facing away from the grave, and a woman with brilliant blue hair with a flower perched atop her head. They were engaged in quiet conversation.

A man with red hair like blood stood away from the crowd. A younger man with black hair – Naruto could not see his face – broke free, perhaps to console him.

And there were more still. There was a girl with maroon-colored hair and glasses who looked at Sasuke with sorrow. Another man with hair that was of a brilliant orange hue looked at the ground. A third, one with silver hair, was shaking his head slowly.

Relatives. All around. He could tell by the pitch-black hair, the stern features.

A man who looked like he had begun the descent into his late thirties had been the first to embrace Sasuke. The younger Uchiha had stiffened with shock, and had proceeded to clasp the other man's arm, and he began to cry.

Naruto forced himself to look away. He could hear Sasuke's whimper of, "Uncle Obito... this is all my fault..."

The blonde knew he couldn't help. This was Sasuke's struggle. He could only watch.

It cut Naruto deep to see the once proud and strong man shaking in grief. It was scary to see how much things could change by just one twist of fate. It hurt even more to know that nothing could be done.

No words of comfort would help; Sasuke would be deaf to them, not wanting to blame anyone but himself. It would be so much easier to blame the cat that Itachi had tried to save, but the animal was innocent. Sasuke, on the other hand, was not. He had threatened his brother countless times to keep the small animal safe, but he only meant for his brother to keep it _fed_ when he was away.

He did not want his brother to die because of it.

The rain began to fall in heavy sheets and the groups of mourners began their descent back to the warm vehicles that awaited them.

Naruto turned to Sasuke, who was still standing by the grave, his charcoal eyes flowing with tears

"Come on, let's get out of this weather." Naruto said.

Sasuke only looked at the blonde, not even bothering to budge. "I don't think I ever told him how much I loved him." His voice was hoarse from crying.

"I am _sure_ he knew Sasuke. He loved you too." Sasuke nodded and finally went to stand next to Naruto. Wrapping an arm around the raven's waist, Naruto led him to the car and away from the final resting place of Uchiha Itachi.

Sasuke wiped his face, looking at the blonde with fear in his eyes. Something had occurred to him, something...

Naruto wasn't sure where the brunette's thoughts had swung to, but he didn't like it. Sasuke's face fell almost unnoticeably.

"Let go of me," he said.

"W-what?" Naruto was stunned. Sasuke had never taken a tone of such... hatred. At least not with him.

"I said, let. Go. Of. Me."

Naruto's heart shattered. "Sasuke?"

Sasuke slapped his hands away. "Get off. Let me go." The raven shook him off, leaving him speechless and motionless to run. The black limo where Sasuke's mother was in was obviously where the brunette was going.

"Sasuke! Sasuke, please! Don't..." Naruto fell to his knees, water soaking his dress pants. It was cold on his skin. _Like Sasuke's heart?_

Sasuke was gone. Again.

And all he could do now was watch the car drive away.

"And... He just _left_. Chouji... I think he hates me. I don't know what's wrong with him!" Naruto's head was in his hands and his shoulders shook with suppressed sobs. "I know he's grieving, and he's convinced it's his fault, but..."

The large man was an unexpected source of comfort.

"Sasuke's going through some tough shit right now, Naruto. Okay, that's an understatement. But he needs time to heal. No matter what he says; I know Sasuke. He may have told you, in fewer words, that he doesn't want you around... you know and I know that he's lying.

"What he needs is someone to listen to him. Someone who won't judge him by this event. Naruto, you know, you're that person. I think... I think you need to be there for Sasuke as much as he needs you to be there for him. If that makes any sense at all. That came out funny."

Naruto let out a hollow laugh. "I gotcha, Chouji. So... my god. This means I have to chase the little bastard down now. Give him a biiiiiig hug. Okay, he'd kill me dead."

The brunette shop owner grinned at him. "Good luck, Naruto. You guys have been through enough shit already. I'm not the only one who knows about all of it, but I guess I'm among the few. I'm actually kinda proud that you'd share your past with me. Makes me feel... I dunno, awesome."

Naruto clapped the larger man on the back. "Well, you _are_ awesome, so whatever. Anyone ever recommend being a counselor? Maybe you should be a bartender. They get lots of sob stories. You should go for it."

Chouji groaned and, dropped his head on the counter. "Not this again. First Sasuke, now you... If you get to talk to him, tell him I say hi."

"I am wounded. Sasuke spilled his heart out to you? I have to go reclaim his ass now."

_Assuming he'll talk to me. Despite what Chouji said... I still get the feeling that Sasuke's rejecting me for some other __reason_, Naruto thought.

The blonde let out a sigh as he left the parlor, his heart heavy. He pulled out his phone and hit the speed dial.

Half a minute passed. Three dial tones. A fourth, a fifth. No one picked up. The recorded message played: 'You've reached Uchiha Sasuke. I can't pick up the phone right now, or I just hate you. If you are of the latter group, don't trouble yourself by calling back. If not, leave a message. Right now.'

A beep.

"Sasuke. Sasuke, I love you. You may not want to talk to me for a long time, and I understand that. But I... I'm here for you. No matter how annoying I can get, I'll always offer an ear. If you want, you can call me back. If not... well, I'll see you around. You know where to reach me. Chouji says hi."

Naruto closed his phone. He sat down on the curb. _Maybe I should just get really smashed, and try to forget about all of this.  
_

_  
... all of this? Forget what, exactly? Itachi's death? Itachi in general? That damn cat? _Sasuke?_ Do I want to forget loving Sasuke?_

Sasuke sat on the plush chair in his dimly lit room. His hand was extended in front of him, gripping his cell firmly as if to break it in half

Still, Naruto's message played within his mind. That desperate voice calling him, telling him words of comfort. Sasuke longed to call Naruto, to tell him all his troubles and guilt. But no. It could not be done. Sasuke could see that now. Naruto was better off without him. Sasuke could not hurt him like he had his brother.

Naruto would only find pain and grief if he stayed by his side. Sasuke could look from afar and see the blond dobe smile and be happy, rather than sad like he had been so many times before while being with the brunette.

_But that's not true, think of all the times he smiled for you. _A voice inside Sasuke/him tried to reason but failed.

_I will only end up killing him in the end. If not physically, then mentally._ A lone tear fell down his face. Clutching the cell phone once more, he promptly erased the message and closed the phone, leaving it forgotten on his desk.

"Good-bye Naruto." It was all he whispered as he let himself be overcome by despair.

"You're so much better off without me."

* * *

Man. I love this chapter. Anyways. Raise your hand if you caught the ItaKisaDei (Or whatever order you prefer- KisaItaDei, DeiItaKisa; etc) threesome hints! ;D

That would be me again. The creator of Sasuke's nervous rhyme-y stuff has decided that Itachi's in a threesome, and thus... yeah. Okay. You know the drill. Kalio's weird.

Reviews are nice.


	11. In which there is autophobia

Making up for lost time? Maybe. But here's chapter 11, as written by Kaliotrimma and Akiru, with some much beloved edits by Simple-Minded Idiot. Or is she the beloved one?

* * *

Naruto let his head rest in his hands. Three days had passed since the funeral. Sasuke still hadn't responded to his calls. All seventeen of them had been ignored.

"Bastard. Sasuke, you bastard. You stupid, fucking bastard." Naruto muttered.

There was no response. Of course not. Why would there be?

"I'm going crazy. Talking to myself. Can you get so lonely that you'd just _die_?"

"Yeah, but not if I'm here to beat the crap out of you." His door creaked open, a face grinning in at him. "Merry Christmas. Your gift came early."

"... Who the hell gave you my key?" Naruto glared at Kiba. "Not a good time."

"Missing your boyfriend?" Kiba gave him an almost pitying look. "Dude. You know Sasuke has always been about as emotionally stable as... as... I dunno. A pin balanced on a pencil. Remember that incident in physics classwhere somebody mentioned carbon monoxide and he turned into a piece of wood?"

"Well, that _is_ how his father died," Naruto reminded the other man, "so you can't blame him."

"I think you should walk up to him and just friggin' punch him." Kiba said, shrugging. "But don't listen to me. I've never been with another guy."

"It shows," Naruto grumbled. "Dude. Can you just––"

"You know, I'm not very smart. I barely made it through college. But you know, I don't need to be smart to see that this is killing you. And I don't even need a brain to see how much you care for Sasuke. Okay. Sappy time. You love him. It shows because there's misery radiating from you right now. Yeah, I said love. You know what? You love me, too. But you love me as a friend. You love Sasuke as an equal, as a second half. Anyway. I don't do poetry or romance or... I dunno."

Naruto shook his head, chuckling. "You shouldn't even try. Dude, shut up."

Kiba let out a short, barking laugh. "Yeah, yeah. Wanna go get drunk? You'll feel awful in the morning, but it'll be about something other than Sasuke. Although your landlord told me this great story. Have you guys... um... It might just be a rumor, but did you guys have sex?"

Naruto glared at him. "Yeah. So what?"

"You rock, man." The brunette held his hands up. "I don't have a problem with it. You have the right to nail whoever you want. Seriously, though, wanna get drunk?"

"Dude, I can't. I have to finish up this chapter and ship it to Sakura."

"Huh. Well, if you need to rant and Chouji's not available, I'll always have half an ear for you. Maybe." Kiba shrugged. "Actually, wait, what time is it?"

Naruto flung his head back, looking behind him to the clock on the wall. "It's ten to five."

"Huh. I have a little bit of time then."

"Going somewhere?"

"Uh, yeah. I have to be Hinata's pack mule in about twenty minutes. She's buying crap to put in her new apartment, and she asked me to help. I know what that means."

"She moved out of the parent's house? Finally."

Kiba frowned. "She's been living with Neji recently. Apparently, she had a fight with her dad and Neji took her in since she didn't have enough cash to make it on her own."

"Damn. Why didn't she tell anyone? I just talked to her the other day on Sasuke's..." Naruto's face fell before he could finish his sentence. Kiba rapidly answered the question, distracting the blonde.

"She didn't want to be a burden. Man, she's sweet, but she can be so stupid sometimes. I think she's turning into you, Blondie."

"So I'm sweet and cuddly now?" Naruto raised his eyebrows. "Excuse me. I may be huggable, but I'm no kawaii bastard like Sasuke,"

"... _Kawaii?_" Kiba stared at him, mystified. Naruto shook his head.

"It's Japanese. Sasuke's got some Japanese in him. He uses some phrases without realizing it sometimes. It wears off on you. Anyway.. Go. Frolic with your pwetty girlfriend. Pet her hair for me. Is it still long or did she cut it?"

"She took a couple inches off, but it's still long enough to cover the goods." Kiba motioned at his own chest. "Anyway. Yeah, I should probably make a break for it. She'll give me _that look_ if I'm late."

"The innocent, hurt look?"

"That's the one. By the way, your crazy landlord's awesome. I told him where I was headed and he just threw your key at me."

"... Old man's so dead."

"Nah. He's my magic source now. I swear, he's the best landlord ever." Kiba chuckled, shoes tapping lightly on the tiles in front of Naruto's door. "See you around."

"Dude! Who sent you here?" Naruto yelped before Kiba could close the door behind him. "Shino got it from – Okay, I forgot the exact line-up, but Chouji told Shikamaru, and Ino wormed it out of him, and she proceeded to send it all around the world."

"So now, pretty much everyone knows the woes of my life." Naruto said blandly.

"Yup, sucks to be you." With that being said, Kiba left his friend standing there glaring at his back.

Naruto couldn't lie. He was happy to see Kiba. Somehow, the mutt always made him laugh, and that alone was a major help.

His perfect little world had come crashing down so quickly that at times, when he was sitting alone in the dark, he wondered if everything could ever be the same.

Sasuke had become an enigma to him. His emotional state was to be expected, but Naruto had never seen Sasuke's coldness coming.

He had expected a broken Uchiha, but not a cold and distant one, and it hurt. It hurt so much to think that what they had could be broken so easily.

So what if they had been only dating for a little while? They had been best friends for longer than Naruto could remember.

They had been through everything together, and they always came out of it with a smile plastered on their faces.

So why was this any different? Why couldn't Naruto fix this?

Was it because Sasuke had lost his brother? Could it be because he blamed himself? Or was it a combination of both?

Naruto did not know, but he sure as hell wish he did.

"Damn you Sasuke." He cursed Sasuke again, feeling comfort at the childish act.

"Why can't you see that this is hurting me as much as I know it's hurting you?" Naruto kept the tears at bay. He could not afford to cry now.

Finding whatever determination he had left, Naruto picked up the phone and dialed that number that was now carved into the forefront of his mind.

"And Kiba is a bastard..." He muttered as the dial tone sounded, tapping his foot against the table after he sat down on the couch "Kiba, you bastard, you always leave in such a weird way. Huh... Sasuke, pick up the phone."

There was a click. "You've reached Uchiha Sasuke..."

"Blah, blah, blah," Naruto said, tuning out the rest of the message.

"... leave a message. Right now."

There was a beep.

"Sasuke, you friggin' bastard! PICK UP THE PHONE! Pick it up, right now, and answer me! You can't ignore me forever! Pick up the phone. I will not stop leaving you messages until I can talk to you! Sasuke! I'm worried about you! I swear to god, I'll-"

Sasuke wouldn't know what Naruto would do. The message clicked off before he could finish. He was out of message time.

"... Dammit. Pick up the phone." Naruto sobbed out, letting his head sink into his hands. "Pick up the phone. Don't leave me."

Fear of loneliness. Was there a name for it? I'm-acting-like-a-little-boy-o-phobia sounded right.

He pulled his laptop over to him, and pulled up a search on for the 'fear of being alone.'

"Autophobia is the persistent and irrational – irrational my friggin' ass – fear of being alone. The word is derived from the Greek words _autos_ meaning "self" and _phobos_ meaning "fear." Many people who fear being alone also fear being unloved, unwanted, and unrecognized. This fear often leads sufferers to enter into and remain in destructive social relationships – pssh, bullshit. It can also lead them to engage in co-dependency and self-destructive behavior, as well as continued and prolonged isolation from others – why would it lead to isolation if that's what the person's afraid of? Makes no sense."

Naruto sighed. He dialed Sasuke's number again. After the message played and the beep sounded, he yelled out, "Dammit, Sasuke, I have autophobia and so do you so let's snuggle and make it all better!"

Beep.

He called again.

Click.

"Hello?" someone asked.

"M-Mrs. Uchiha. Hello. Uh... Is Sasuke there? Um... this _is_ his phone." Naruto stammered.

* * *

DUN DUN DUUUUUUN. Cliffhanger, yay! We don't do many of those. And just so you know, I actually looked that phobia up. It's real. Very real. Seriously, check anywhere. I paraphrased from Wiki. I might have autophobia, but Naruto most certainly does, in series and in fic.

Reviews are my happy crack, and they don't cost anything.


	12. In which there is a visit

CHA! Cliffhanger resolved! So, feeling a bit cruel for leaving off like that and waiting so long to update. But Akiru and I are both back in school; Akiru's in college and I just started high school, so I guess we're both in rough spots. But anyways. Seeing as I felt like a little self-advertisement, Akiru and I BOTH, in fact, have DA accounts. Yes. So you should look us up- same names because we rock and keep things simple. I've been doing a bit of fanart for this fic, look for it if you've got time. So. Long... This chapter's pretty long, even without this blurp I'm writing. Also, I dunno how many people are aware, somewhere within my craptastically long profile page (Yeah. I'll clean it up sometime.) I keep updates on this fic, so you'll know when we're starting a chapter, about half-way, and waiting for the beta'd version. Okay. So.

WE HAVE SPECIAL AWARDS. Okay, I do, Akiru has nothing to do with the special awards (Except for getting one.). They're at the bottom, seeing as they pertain to the new review reward system down there. (That I have neglected to ask Akiru about.) So you should check that out too. When you finish the chapter, obviously.

Speaking of, here it is, Smudging Ink chapter 12. Written by Akiru chan and Kaliotrimma, beta'd by Simple-Minded Idiot.

* * *

A smooth, sweet voice flowed from the other end of the phone, instantly calming Naruto's racing heart. It was strange how a mother could do that. 

"Is this Naruto?" Mikoto asked.

"Yes ma'am, it is."

"I'm glad you called, but I am afraid that Sasuke can't come to the phone."

"But Mrs. Uchiha..." He tried to plea.

"I am sorry dear, but he has yet to speak a word since he got home from the funeral." Naruto heard her voice crack as if she was trying to hold back unshed tears.

"It's all just so hard on him. He seems to be in his own little world... I hope he comes around soon. After all, he was finally coming out of his shell... I have you to thank for that. My little boy was finally coming back to me, it seemed."

A smile graced his lips despite himself at her heartfelt words. Despite himself? It seems a bit out of place here in the way you put it.

"Naruto, please don't give up on my son. I know what he is doing now is hurting you deeply, but I know you can save him from his grief. He loved you so much."

"Mrs. Uchiha... I... I won't give up."

"Thank you dear, oh thank you so much..." She had started to cry, her muffled sobs coming across the line.

Naruto felt helpless. He wanted to comfort her. Crying wasn't something he enjoyed in general. "Uh... Mrs. Uchiha, I-I promise you. I'll do everything I can to help Sasuke. Could you... could you tell him I miss him?"

There was a small pause. Naruto was certain that she was wiping her face and attempting to compose herself.

"I'll make sure that I do." She paused again, taking a deep breath. "Feel free to come over whenever you'd like because I'm sure Sasuke won't be calling any time soon. That boy..." She trailed off, clearly lost in thought.

Naruto gave her a minute before he began to speak again. "Um. Well."

Mrs. Uchiha gasped. "Oh, I'm sorry dear. I must be holding you up. I'll just let you go then. You're always welcome in our home."

Naruto blinked, extremely confused. "Uh. Okay. Well. I guess I'll, uh, see you around sometime."

"That you will. Goodbye, dear."

"Goodbye, Mrs. Uchiha."

There was a click as the phone disconnected. Naruto let out a long breath.

_Talking to your boyfriend's mother on the phone is very awkward,_ he thought to himself.

"Ummmm. What do I do now?" Naruto thought aloud, figuring since no one else was around, he could get away with speaking his thoughts. "I should probably finish this chapter for Sakura-chan..."

He leaned forward, tossing one of his throw pillows across the room in an attempt to think. Hey, they had to be called 'throw pillows' for a reason, right?

"Okay. Think, think, think. Think rhymes with kink. I have a kink for Sasuke... This isn't what I'm supposed to be thinking about."

In the end, Naruto gave it up as a job badly done and went to get something to eat. He then discovered that either he'd been ramen-robbed or he'd eaten all the food in his home. Except for a box of pocky.

He looked at the pocky uncertainly. It was already open, which meant it was no longer his pocky. This was _Sasuke's_ pocky. He could never eat it. But... there was no other food in the apartment. Well, edible food.

Three minutes later, Naruto was curled up on his couch, the box of pocky untouched in his pantry.

Naruto sat, staring at the flashing screen of the TV, its contents flashing eerie glows into the darkness that had settled into the room.

He did not know how long he had sat there. His mind had been nothing but a tangle of thoughts.

The things that came to mind were painful, yet, despite everything, they needed to be heard.

That phone conversation with Sasuke's mom had boosted his hope, but at the same time, it had put a completely new burden on his already tired shoulders.

Before the conversation, Naruto was only out to get Sasuke back for himself, no matter how greedy that sounded. He knew deep down that both his and the Uchiha's happiness depended on it and if he failed, then it would only be the two of them who would be hurt.

But now, after Mrs. Uchiha's pleas, Naruto could now see just how many people were looking at him to bring back the happiness they had lost when Sasuke closed himself off from the world.

He had people counting on him, pleading for him to bring back the Sasuke they knew and loved.

Naruto only wished that he could do it. He knew he would not give up, but Sasuke would also have to want to be helped in order for any progress to happen.

Without that, Naruto would be sure to fail, no matter how determined he might be.

He decided that he would call again. Sasuke was trying to sleep. He really was. But the thoughts racing through his head kept him awake, and he couldn't make them stop.

_I miss Naruto. I wonder if he's thinking about me. Did I do the right thing? What if I didn't do the right thing? Does he hate me? He can't hate me, he keeps calling me. But what if he's trying to tell me it's over? I already told him it was over, so that can't be it; what could it be? _

_I don't understand anything. I miss Naruto because I care about him. I miss... I miss Itachi. I miss him. I want him to come back and to be there for me again, and I want him to jab my forehead and call me his foolish little brother. I love him. I love my brother, and I can never tell him that. I never told Naruto how I felt. I need to stop this. I..._

Sasuke curled up in his bed, cocooned in blankets, and he shoved his face in his pillow to mask his tears.

"I'm such an idiot." He muttered to himself, nearly missing the knock on his door.

"Sasuke? Are you awake?" His mother asked him through the door.

"Do I want to be?" Sasuke groaned, raising his head. "Yeah. I'm up."

"You have a visitor," Mikoto trailed off. "Are you going to come out of there?"

Sasuke was already on his feet, pulling on a pair of pants and hopping. "Hold on, hold on... Okay."

As soon as the word left his lips, the door flew open and he was knocked to the floor. He could hear footsteps as his mother snuck away.

"OW! Ow, fuck, the hell are you doi— _Sakura_?" Sasuke's face exploded with shock. "What— How— You know where I live?"

Sakura frowned at him. "'Course I do, Sasuke-kun. Come on, Naruto mentioned it. A lot. He misses you, you know."

Sasuke went silent, his features freezing into an emotionless mask. He turned away. "If you're here to lecture me, don't bother. Whatever kind of relationship we had, I... ended it."

The young woman glared at him, crawling off his legs. "Oh, sure, because Naruto's certainly given up on you. Come on, Sasuke, you obviously love him and I can tell he loves you."

"I know. He told me."

Sasuke's head connected with the floor again, having just been graced by Sakura's fist. His hand shot up to feel his nose as he stared at her in shock. "What the HELL was that for?"

"He _told_ you? He confessed and you dumped him? You— you— bastard!"

Then Sasuke knew she was furious. When Sakura was mad, she came up with some pretty creative curses, but now...

_She's too mad to swear. Oh shit._

Then Sasuke realized his nose was bleeding. "Dammit, Sakura, you crazy bitch!"

"Don't you even start! He loves you! You hurt him so much!" Sakura yelled, nearly decking him again. He could tell by the way her fist twitched. She finally looked away. "I can't believe you."

Sasuke was silent. _Neither can I._

"Call him." She said after a while.

"_What_?" He exclaimed.

"You heard me. Call him."

Having grown up as a mother-fearing child, Sasuke couldn't help but obey when Sakura used the 'I know what's best' tone. His hand scrabbled on the floor, knowing he'd dropped his phone there. His hand closed around the charger, and he swore. "It's not here."

Sakura waved a blindingly pink piece of plastic in his face. "Use mine."

Sasuke flinched as she punched the numbers in. She dropped the phone next to him.

"Hullo, Sakura-chan." Naruto's voice oozed depression.

Sasuke winced, feeling a wave of guilt. Sakura pinched him, hard. "OW! Friggin— I called! You crazy—"

"_Sasuke_?... Why are you using Sakura-chan's phone?"

"She made me," Sasuke grumbled. "Crazy—" He cut off, glancing at Sakura.

"—bitch?" Naruto finished for him. "Listen, Sasuke, I-I understand that you need some time to adjust," Naruto knew he was treading in dangerous waters," but... I really miss you and... Is it just me or do I sound like a bad romance novel? I really... I... I should give up, shouldn't I?"

Sasuke attempted to stifle a chuckle. "Yes. Please do."

"Okkies. Did I just say that? Yes I did. I talk too much, don't I?" "You really do." And Sasuke found himself wishing he was in Naruto's apartment with him, so that Naruto could hold him and rest his chin on Sasuke's shoulder. "I just... I wish that this never happened." The pause made him rethink his phrasing. "Not us. Never, never us. I do miss you... but I-I just don't think I'm ready for this... relationship."

"I get it, Sasuke, you don't need to explain. You know I could wait a hundred years for you to be ready, although you'd probably get a skeleton at that point- I'd be dead too, but whatever. Hey, that would be weird. Necrophi—"

"No," Sasuke cut him off, "that would not be cool. I... I can't say when I'll be ready again."

"I just told you I can wait."

"... I'm running out of things to say."

"Kiba visited." Naruto said randomly. Sasuke imagined the face he was making. "He pissed the hell off me."

"Dogface pissed you off. Oh, joy. Sakura sat on me and nearly broke my nose."

"Ouch. I'm outta shit to say too. Okay... You are aware that I love you and miss you lots. Um... Your mom talked to me. Not important. Uh. Yep, definitely out of conversation topics. Time to hang up."

"Yes."

"So... hanging up."

"Just hang up, you idiot." Sasuke smiled slightly.

"Why don't you hang up?"

"You said you'd hang up."

"Why? Is it beneath you to hang up a phone?"

Sasuke thought for a moment, piecing together a comeback. "But you already told me that you'd do it, therefore, you must, or you'd have gone back on your word."

"Cheeky bastard. I love you." Naruto chuckled, and Sasuke knew the blonde was grinning. He grinned too, opening his mouth to respond.

"I know. I love me too."

"Hey!"

"What happened to hanging up the phone?"

"I was going to!"

And then Sakura pulled the phone away from him. "Okay, how about I hang up?"

"But then he'd have gone back on his word!" Sasuke drawled, starting when his voice synchronized with Naruto's indignant cry of "But then I'd have gone back on my word!"

"Then hang up." Sakura said in a flat voice.

There was a loud click as Naruto hung up, obviously fearing for his life. Sasuke let his head drop to his floor.

"Happy?" "Yes. Extremely happy. My work here is done."

Sakura smiled down at Sasuke as she saw a great change in his expression. It was no longer dead as it had been when she had first arrived. His expression now held a certain warmth within the sadness that still lingered.

It wasn't much, but it meant that the long and hard healing process had begun. Things would still be hard for the two boys, she knew that well, but she was confident that they could reach out of the darkness that had fallen on them and grab the light.

Sasuke and Naruto were strong and they would come out of this. She was sure of it, yet Sakura still wished she could do more.

She had always been the one to watch their back during their school days. They were the ones that always seemed to pick her up as she fell. This time, though, she wished she could do the same, but she knew she couldn't.

_Naruto, I leave the rest to you._ With a smile placed firmly on her face, Sakura said her good-byes and left Sasuke.

If she could not help Sasuke or Naruto directly, then she would just have to watch from the sidelines and help push them to their goal.

_I will never let my boys fall_. It was a promise to herself, one that she knew she would never go back on.

* * *

Yeah, Sakura! You rock, you crazy bitch! Brilliant nickname, it'll probably make some more appearrences. Yes, so I'm being yelled at to go do chores, so I'll keep this short and just say... 

REVIEWS REWARD SYSTEM!!! We've got over 130 reviews at this point, so that's cheer worthy. When we hit 150, I'll do a special piccy for the fic. I'll see if I can get Akiru to color it, she's good at digital colorin'. Once we hit 100 reviews on AFF and 200 on FF, well, the next chapter after that will have a lemon. So if you have an AFF account, review there too!

Concerning this, I have a few more words. Every popular fic out there (And it galls me to think this is so popular, but it is) has a couple of really good reviewers, who put in well-written reviews consistently, using good grammar and actually giving good input to where this fic is going. Okkies. I know, this should probably be closer to the top of the fic, but the people getting this title probably read the bottom blurp, so it doesn't matter. And yes. I AM in fact going overboard with the positive-vibe adjectives. I may just be flattering you guys. BUUUUUUT; in the end of this chapter, I'd like to recognize these reviewers and give them a special title of:

SUPER AWESOME SEXY REVIEWERS. I don't care what you think of yourselves, I'm going to call you all nice things.

FIRST comes a shout-out to CO-AUTHOR OF EXTREME WORSHIP-WORTHY SKILL. Akiru chan, who colors SO much better than I do and has a flair for angst. Check out her stuff.

Second, with the EXTRA title of SUPER AWESOME SEXY REVIEWER/BETA READER

Simple-Minded Idiot. You're there for us. Thank you.

Now for the award-y thing, which somehow ended up as the third thing I did despite me planning on making it first:

menolly1019

strawberries and napkins

Luna-Lunak

Black Juju

Death By Squishy

copygeijutsuka

Thanks so much, you guys! Reading your reviews make me grin. Not that I don't smile every time I get a review; it's just that getting a review that just says something like 'Great chapter, please update soon' just doesn't give an authoress the same feeling. So again, thanks to you guys for reviewing just about every chapter, and not only that, giving us a bit of criticism to work with. And it really helps, despite the popular misconception that criticism makes me bleed from random orifices. (Don't ask, it might have some basis in fact. And I have no idea if I spelled 'orifices' correctly. I never know if I spell words in the author's notes correctly.) I don't think I missed anyone, but if I did, I'm sooooorry; I didn't do it on purpose. I just briefly skimmed the reviews with a couple of names already in mind.

;D


	13. In which there are reunions

HAI GAIZS. Unexpected, amirite? Well, Akiru and I have finally gotten off our asses, yay. Seriously, when did we update last? AGES AGO.

For all you guys who waited patiently, we're mad sorry it took so long. D:

[LOLWITTYDISCLAIMERHERE

We'll try to be more regular with the fic from now on, but enjoy what we have! Also, I myself am writing an original story called _Chasing Rainbows_, which can be found on my deviantART account. There's a link in my profile if you're interested in seeing more of my writing. Yes, shameless plug, but if you enjoy SI, you'll probably enjoy this. Again, it's not fanfiction; it's an original story featuring my own characters in all their homosexual glory.

ANOTHER REASON TO CHECK OUT MY DA. I promised last chapter that I'd do a sketch, and it features something from this chapter. I'll have it up on DA within the next few days. Happy reading, I'll leave you guys alone with the fic now. girlish titter

* * *

Naruto tapped his pen absentmindedly, staring down at the piece of paper before him. He sighed; it was a basic plot outline for the new chapter of his edgy porn, covered with doodles and scribbles.

_No,_ he thought, _it isn't porn, per se. Well. It's tasteful relations. Or something. I need food if I am going to make this all noble._

As if agreeing with the thought, Naruto's stomach growled in earnest. Feeling a bit foolish, Naruto growled back at it and returned to his work.

When the nagging ache of hunger could no longer be ignored, Naruto ventured into his small kitchen in search of sustenance. He wolfed down a stale energy bar, barely tasting it. The fact that it was stale disturbed him; how long did those things last before going bad?

He took a swig of orange juice straight from the carton, something his mother and possibly Sasuke would have hit him for, and gagged as the tang mingled with the aftertaste of the chocolate-something-or-other energy bar. Fighting the impulse to scrape his tongue or perhaps rip it out, Naruto decided that it was time to go shopping. The last time he had checked, his only gallon of milk was currently inhabited by a colony of floating blue bacteria.

Just to be safe, he tied a cloth about his nose and mouth before dumping the milk and its inhabitants out the window of his apartment. As an afterthought, he prayed no one was outside, as he had not looked first.

_Well… those things are probably harmless anyways. I mean, think of all the microscopic crawly things in water, and that doesn't hurt anyone._ Naruto's thoughts paused._ Most of the time. Taaaapeworm. Wait, is that from water or some kind of... Never mind._

Naruto spent several minutes looking for his shoes, triumphantly finding one and failing to uncover the other. (Which, for the record, was jammed halfway under his sofa)

Giving up on that pair of sneakers, he traipsed into his bedroom and went closet diving for another pair. When he found a matching set, he tripped his way back into the small living area, rolling his eyes as he spotted the missing shoe under his couch. Deciding it didn't matter, he shuffled his way to the door of the apartment, tugging his shoes and jacket on. He crept down the stairs, pointedly ignoring Jiraiya, and leapt triumphantly out of the door of the apartment complex, ready to drive off. Then he remembered that he didn't have a car. And, he decided, he couldn't take a bus to the local Giant Eagle either, as it was a Sunday afternoon.

Naruto disliked taking buses on Sundays in general, but especially during the afternoon. Because in the afternoon, there were many Christians on the buses. Christians leaving church.

Naruto disliked the idea of a bus-full of Christians.

Now, understand, Naruto was not anti-Christian. He just did not like to deal with them, because some of the more fanatical ones tended to be anti-him. Naruto had a theory that, at baptism, Christian children, or possibly, to be more specific, Catholic children were implanted with some controversial form of gaydar. He only thought this because they always seemed to realize he was a homosexual. He never could figure out another explanation, as he refused to see himself as flamingly gay.

Either way, Naruto preferred to avoid them and their patronizing stares. So instead, he walked the short distance, taking much longer than he needed to. However, this allowed him to waltz through the sliding doors with some form of pride. He grabbed a basket, then thought of his food-starved home and swapped it for a cart. He took a deep breath, did a mental checklist…

Then proceeded to go flying through the aisles, throwing things into his cart at random. It was his own patented form of grocery shopping, and he was rather fond of it.

He continued this way until he nearly knocked over a display of some overpriced potato chips. Then Naruto decided to chill out, cruising the nearly empty supermarket at a leisurely pace. He stopped to stare at ramen, shrugging and tossing it in his cart with the brand name cereals and microwaveable meals.

A pale hand snuck past him, snatching up a six-pack of ramen.

"Your cart screams 'bachelor,' you know." Neji retorted as a greeting. "Hello."

Naruto stared up at the tall brunette. "Okay. I never, _ever_ expected to see you stooping so low as to shop in a supermarket. Especially buying ramen noodles."

Neji shrugged noncommittally, scooping up a package of rice crackers with obvious dislike. "I will never understand Hinata's infatuation with these… disgusting substances." He eyed Naruto's cart warily. "Stocking up, I see."

"Yeah, well, I've had company." Naruto growled defensively.

"I heard." Neji said coolly. "So, how is Sasuke?"

Naruto's face brightened, then fell. "Well. Apparently the gossip hasn't been keeping up. Or have you been skipping your knitting circle?"

The brunette drew himself up, Thai noodles clutched in one hand. "Excuse me?"

"Sasuke's older brother is… he passed away recently."

"What?" Neji's hand spasmed and he nearly dropped the package.

"There- There was a fire, about three weeks-"

Neji cut him off. "The office fire. I didn't know it was an Uchiha office. And to think, all of those chemicals- Horrible. I heard about it on the news, but… I was late for work."

Naruto looked away; Neji frowned.

"You are no longer an item."

"No shit. He's being… stupid."

The older man glanced at his watch. "He's not being 'stupid,' but he is going through an increasingly difficult point in his life. You should try your utmost to sympathize with him, however different your circumstances may be. And Naruto, despite the absolutely wonderful time we're having here, in a few moments I will have deviated too far from my schedule."

Naruto shrugged. "I guess you're right, but Neji? Next time, try English. What're you late for, hm? Got a daaaate?"

"Hardly," Neji retorted. Naruto followed him to the checkout counter. "I merely serve as Hinata's transport system while her car is in the shop." Neji broke his chain of intelligent conversation by adding "It's a total piece of shit."

Something clicked in Naruto's head. "Say, Hinata works for Sasuke, right? Secretary?"

Neji nodded, stacking his purchases on the conveyer belt.

"Hey Neji. You know, you owe me money from that bet."

The brunette spun around and glared at him. "We were drunk and you know it-" he began angrily.

"No, no, I'm willing to forget it on one condition: You let me come with you." Neji considered this for a moment. "Deal."

"But…" Naruto added, "I'm taking my groceries with me."

Neji sighed and rubbed his temples. "If you must."

"Oh I must." He gave him one of his trademark smiles. Taking the Hyuuga by the wrist, Naruto dragged him up to the check out line.

He contemplated making Neji pay; after all he was losing out on a lot of money forgetting about that bet and all. Sadly, Naruto's conscious got the better of him and he ended up pay with the money he had gotten from one of his newest books.

He thanked the cashier when he was done, and left Neji to get his bags. Yeah, he was going to get him to do as much as he could.

They made it out to the brunette's car and packed the bags in the trunk. Naruto would have to remember that they were back there. The last thing he needed to do was forget about them and go hungry tonight. His precious life support was back there.

"You ready?" Neji was standing by the driver's side door getting ready to get in. "Hinata gets off in twenty minutes. I really would like to get her on time."

Naruto nodded and ran over to the passenger's side door and got in. The moment he sat down he felt his stomach twist and a flock of angry butterflies began to makes themselves known there.

He was going to see Sasuke, again. It was as if he had not known the Uchiha as well as he had. He was acting as if he was about to meet the love of his life for the first time. Well half of that was right.

Neji had been right when he had said that Sasuke was not being stupid. Naruto had been wrong about that, and he hated himself for even thinking about it like that.

Sasuke was still suffering and he was more concerned over their relationship and having Sasuke back in his arms instead of Sasuke's feelings. Could it get anymore selfish?

He knew what he had to do when he got to the Uchiha corp. building. Naruto would have to do something to appease both of them, and he knew just the thing to do.

"We're here." Neji's voice broke through Naruto's inner conversation and brought him back to the real world.

This was it. He would march in there and confront Sasuke.

Taking a deep breath, Naruto got out of the car. "I will be right back... I'll send Hinata down too."

Neji nodded. "I'll wait here."

"Thanks" Naruto walked into the ominous building. It looked like it was glaring at him, as weird as it sounded. Uchiha's knew how to make everything look sinister.

The girl at the receptionist desk in the front greeted him with a smile. He returned it before hurrying up to the sixth floor where he knew Sasuke's office to be.

'_Ok I can do this. Breath Naruto, breath._' he really didn't know what he was getting so worked up about. It wasn't like he was going to per pose to the guy or anything.

"Na--Naruto?" Hinata was sitting at her desk next to the giant double doors of Uchiha Sasuke's office.

"Hey Hinata. Neji is down in the parking lot waiting for you. I am going to have a quick word with Sasuke and then I will be joining you.

She nodded blushing and not meeting his eye. She had always been a weird one in Naruto's opinion.

Turning back around he faced the large doors which had intricate carvings all over their surface. It was very gothic looking and Naruto knew that Sasuke liked the style.

Taking a deep breath Naruto pushed open the doors without knocking and walking in.

The office was empty. Put-off, Naruto stared at the empty desk, wondering where the hell Sasuke could be. There were... Naruto counted silently, seven sticky notes of various rainbow colors adorning said desk, one of them scratched out heavily.

Despite his best intentions, Naruto crept over to the desk and stared down at the notes. There was a memo for a meeting the next day, a note informing Sasuke of a missed call- this one was in Hinata's neat print- a scrawled note stained with water droplets asking when Sasuke was going to visit the 'Super Awesome Office of Much Fun-ness' again that was signed 'Sui,' and four more. One was blank.

Naruto sighed as he read the bright pink note. 'Hey, Sasuke- Just wondering when you're going to patch things up with Naruto, he really seems down. Much luff, Sakura-chan.' Just like her, she'd dotted the note with random doodles and squiggles. Another note put him off- it was a standard yellow Post-it that said 'See me, now' and somehow invoked terror.

He stared at it for a moment, recognizing Sasuke's scrawl. The message itself was nondescript, but relayed a world of annoyance; he imagined Sasuke saying those words, and chills ran down his spine. The man was scary. Very scary.

Naruto realized suddenly that pissed-off Sasuke mildly turned him on. This in itself was startling enough, but more startling was when he heard shouting voices nearing him.

Confused, he made the snap decision of leaving the office instead of the possibly brighter choice of hiding under the desk. Of course, if he hid under the desk, he could give Sasuke the pleasant surprise of a hand in his pants as soon as he sat. That was very tempting, but Sasuke would probably be angry to find Naruto in his otherwise empty office without permission.

"I told you again and again- This isn't the sort of thing you can just slack off on over and over! It needs to be done, and it needs to be done _soon_!"

Sasuke sounded very pissed; Naruto could just make out his figure from through the lowered shades of a closed door.

"Sir, with all due respect, come on. You know me better than that! You know it'll get done, no matter what! I'll make the deadline, I promise!"

"I don't care what you promise, I need progress. And I mean tangible progress. Those drafts have to be in soon so we can get them to the editor for the final check. The deadline's in four days, normally I wouldn't even have let you go this long without warning you." Naruto fancied that there would be a vein pulsing on Sasuke's temple, based on the controlled anger in his voice. "I'm warning you now. If it's not done by Wednesday, I'm reassigning the project, and you'll be the one who breaks it to the author. And you'll be saying exactly whose fault it all is if it's still late."

Naruto winced. Sasuke could be mean. Really mean. But he sounded like he wasn't just being mean, he was pushed-to-the-limits mean. Pissed off to an extreme and trying not to vent horribly.

The door opened, and Naruto sat quickly on Hinata's neat-but-cluttered desk, trying not to disturb anything. Sasuke backed out of the room, no doubt leaving a thoroughly cowed employee, and rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"Fucking idiots," he muttered quietly, black bangs falling into his face. "God. I'm gonna have to do it myself. I hate dealing with the editors, they're soooo..." He glanced up sharply, registering the blonde's presence. "Naruto? What the hell!"

"Um. Just... dropped by to say hi?" Naruto attempted feebly. "Okay, so I ran into Neji and bribed-"

Sasuke coughed. "Blackmailed."

"Same thing. I _bribed_ him to take me along for the ride when he came to pick up Hinata. By the way, did she seem paler than normal to you?"

"It's just you." Sasuke rolled his eyes, wondering exactly how oblivious the other man was. "I was just..."

"Telling someone off. You're a bit loud when you get angry."

"Great. Tell me how to do my job, why don't you."

Naruto frowned. "I'm not trying to pry. You're putting words in my mouth. But you sound like you could use a break from all this."

"I do." Sasuke said flatly, locking his office door from the outside. Naruto slid off the desk ungracefully, nearly scattering a pile of papers. "I really do. But I used up all my sick days."

Sasuke didn't explain, but Naruto knew what he was getting at; Sasuke had skipped work somewhat religiously for several weeks after Itachi's death. Now, he was probably swamped with work that he had failed to complete before his leave of absence.

"So." Naruto said quietly. "How are you? Besides stressed- if you need help, I can do grunt work."

"No, no, we've got all the grunt we need-" Sasuke blanched. "-Maybe we have a little too much grunt, I still need to replace that table in the break room."

"Ooh, do tell." Naruto said, interested immediately. "What happened in there?"

"And I have to smooth over the sexual harassment shit that Karin's trying to pull over on us... and then there's the condolences I have to give. I'm so sick of this."

"Seriously, what happened?"

"Oh, Suigetsu and Karin had a tiff in the break room. He... well, he's saying that he just nudged her, she's screaming that he copped a feel- eventually, she threw him into a table and killed it dead. She's threatening to file for sexual harassment, I'm going to have to practically sleep with her to get her to drop it."

"But you won't." Naruto said quickly. "Sleep with her. I mean, you said she's a horrid bitch who takes everything out of proportion but manages to be a good worker when she's not trying to get in your... yes. You're not going to actually do anything with her because you don't like her. At all. I mean."

"Cut it out." Sasuke said tiredly. "I'm not interested. She is a horrid bitch. I would like to strangle her some day. But she does want in my pants; too bad Suigetsu's up her skirt. Figuratively. They totally hate each other, but in that 'I would like to ravish you just to piss you off and possibly get some sexual gratification' way. Like, angry violent sex types. A lot. The tension in there is very thick."

"And sexual." Naruto said with an intelligent tip of his head. He took a few steps. "Although I'm not sure how long Neji will wait for me; I'll have to tamper with his car next time. He'll try to ditch me."

"There's too much tension in my life." Sasuke muttered. "Somebody shoot me now."

Naruto raised his eyebrows. "Wouldn't you prefer a good lay to being dead?"

"Possibly." Sasuke said distractedly. "Don't push me on that one though."

"Oh, come on, what's better than angry make-up sex?"

"I don't know. I've never had it."

Naruto's eyebrows disappeared into the stratosphere. "Are you freaking serious? Actually, neither have I now that I think about it, I wonder if it's all it's cracked up to be."

"Probably not, but you would like to test that theory by screwing me on my desk."

"Absolutely."

"No."

"Aw."

"No."

"Please?" Naruto widened his eyes and attempted to make them tear up.

"Um. I'm considering it quite seriously... no."

"But _Sasuke_," Naruto groaned, "I've been abstinent for over a month now."

"I'll get you a cookie for the accomplishment."

"I would prefer sex."

"I'm sure you would." Sasuke said dully. He stared out the second story window in front of him. "I think Neji just started up his car. His is the silver one right there? I think the licence plate says Hyuuga, so I'll say it's him."

"Shit, serious? I gotta dash then." Thinking quickly and weighing the pros and cons, Naruto snatched Sasuke's hand and dragged him down the stairs as well.

"Naruto! Stop it! Stop pulling me!" Sasuke yelled, nearly turning his ankle on a step. He decided that running as well was a good idea. "What the hell are you planning here?"

"Dragging you is loads of fun. You make a great face, perfect for a gag Christmas card. It's great; seriously, your eyes go really wide and stuff." Naruto hit the ground floor hard, and Sasuke nearly tripped. "Watch your step. Jeez, it's your building, why would you trip?"

"Oh, I dunno," Sasuke said sarcastically. "Might be the lunatic yanking me around."

Naruto practically kicked the front door open, signalling to Neji. The brunette frowned behind the wheel, about to pull out of his parking spot. Naruto gave him a 'Be right there' gesture, and turned back to Sasuke.

"Hullo." He said calmly. Sasuke stared at him, hair and clothes in disarray.

"'Hullo.' What the hell is wrong with you." But it was said without venom. "With the way I look, Neji probably thinks we've been making out- I'm a total mess. You mussed my hair. I hate you."

"Hey, you're in casual dress, it's all good." Naruto said calmly. "Wrinkly clothes suit you, they make you look adorable."

"That's not good thing," Sasuke said distractedly, smoothing down his double layer of shirts. "At least you can't mess up jeans. I swear, you're a walking tornado."

"Yes." "I'm not sure if you understood, but that was actually an insult."

Naruto grinned happily. "Which means things are back to normal- you're insulting me, I'm acting like an idiot, and we're making Neji waste gas. All good."

"Sure." Sasuke said sarcastically.

"Hey, you've got your snark back. Yaaaay." Naruto's grin widened, and he pursed his lips. "Chu?"

"If it will shut you up." Sasuke said in mock-exasperation. "Fine." He tilted his face slightly, bringing their lips into contact. Neji honked desperately, attempting to bring an end to the romantic moment. But he didn't have to; Sasuke started as if burned. "Hey, Sasuke, are you okay?"

Sasuke had gone pale, paler than normal. "I- I have to go. S-sorry."

And he turned tail and ran, leaving Naruto to stand in shock for at least the third time since they'd met. "What? Sasuke! Sasuke, wait!"

Sasuke kept running, without looking back until he'd burst into his office - pausing to unlock it again- and closed the door. He sat down, hard, on the floor, and stared at his hands.

It couldn't be normal to, when kissing your yet-again-boyfriend, have the image of your deceased brother flash before your eyes.

* * *

OMG NU.

Sasuke wrrrrrrry? Ormorelike ITACHI WRRRRRRRRRRY?!?!? Why must you haunt your brother so?

D:

I can just imagine it. You can too; especially if you guys have read chapter 386 of Naruto. Take the cracked out Itachi face, and edit it to say "im in ur hed, messin' wit ur love life." Seriously, he's all :DDDDDDDD

Lololol. I'm overusing chatspeak in this. I suck so much.

SUBLIMINALMESSAGINGMYDAISAWESOME.


End file.
